Socially, girls still appear to worry more about appearance and appropriateness rather than intellect or character. Young women suffer from such tragically low self-esteem, it has given rise to organizations like Girls on the Run which work in elementary schools to reverse this trend, or media efforts like the Dove campaign for "normal" women. Despite these efforts, however, eating disorders, self-harming behaviors, and suicide rates remain outrageously high.
Add in a healthy dose of bitter, backstabbing girl bullying, and the outlook is bleak. When she was 19, author Sara Shandler capitalized on her own sense of isolation, fear, and lack of confidence and put together a compilation of teenage girl's journals, essays, poems and stories revealing the universality of this suffering. She also exposes rampant sexual abuse, abuse that is often tolerated or even encouraged by the media (check out the Miss Representation Project).
So, what is wrong with girls? What insight can you gain from these sources?
Why, after so much success, does a girl still face this social construct?
What should we do about it?
What is it like for girls in our school, in our town, in this culture?
Girls tend to idolize model figures and these "beautiful" women and try to be just as perfect as they are, we try to get rid of any flaw that we see in ourself. We rarely look at the good in us rather we focus on the things that can and should be fixed about ourselves- this causes low self-esteem and depression as we forget aboout ourselves. Girls dont apprecaite who THEY are. As for some girls in our school who flaunt their beauty and put theirself above everyone else cause other girls who are still trying to build theirself get lost in who they are. They become "fragil"
ReplyDeleteEven when we are sucessful we feel that we still have to reach higher to do better than everyone else, in our control group. Almost like we are "never" sucessful enough because there is always someone better than us.
We should try to be more content with who we are and stop comparing ourselves to "better" and "prettier" people. We shuold not let others put us down in any aspect. Maybe we should focus more on life opposed to how "beautiful" we are. We will never be perfect and we should be okay with that.
-Lauren Knarr and Nerisia Ngum
i totally agree with this
Deletequanesha clay
I know exactly what's wrong with girls. Everything and nothing. Girls face many societal and parental pressures. Dove's campaign, that included the "Real Beauty Project," showed women of many different colors, shapes, and sizes. Being a girl who has been fat shamed my whole life, the Dove campaign meant the world to me. Low self-esteem has been an issue for me my whole life. Though the Dove project was beautiful, it was also wrong. It showed no real "fat" women, just women with curves that were considered bigger. This sends their whole message askew- the one that you're beautiful no matter what. Yet, another great example of this is the Victoria's Secret "Love My Body," campaign- they only showed very skinny women of different races. To me- this is exactly what is wrong with girls. They see these two different campaigns- and feel ashamed. They don't understand that all body types are beautiful- whether skinny or fat. Body shaming (of any kind) has become a huge societal issue- one all over the media. Eating disorders are one of girls' biggest issues- mainly anorexia. Many women believe that because they aren't a size 0 that they aren't beautiful. The media is what's wrong with girls- not the girls themselves.
ReplyDelete-Olivia Leathers
I agree with Olivia 110% I think girls see these models that are a size 0 and feel...almost ashamed that they might not live up to that particular face or body type. (Speaking from personal experience) I really think evolution has done that to us.
DeleteMarilyn Monroe was known as the largest sex icon of her time. And guess what? Her thighs touched, she was not "fit" She has arm fat, her boobs were not perky, and she had stretch marks. Yet, she was known as the most beautiful women of her time. Women now a days that are classified as "beautiful" wear a size 0, have a "perfect" bust, 13 inch waist, their legs don't touch, flawless skin, a glowing complection, and straight, white teeth. Thanks a lot America.
Hannah Hyatt
I definitely agree with Olivia. I've personally gone through extremely difficult times, all because I felt as if I wasn't thin enough, or attractive enough. These standards were all set by the media, just like Olivia said.
DeleteIt isn't our fault that we're the way we are. It's all about the things around us, the things that influence us.
I agree with Olivia as well. I have seen so many girls that have gone into depression because they don't think that they are pretty enough, or attractive enough. It isn't their fault; it's the fault of the things that influence them.
Delete~Shelby McKinney
this comment may not count, because it isn't about whats wrong with girls per se, but I always see girls as the way they act, not the physical way they look. So most girls can be ugly, but all of them are beautiful in their own way
Delete(Don't hit me please)
Tyler Chapman
This is very thoughtful i totally agree
Delete0 means nothing so it shouldn't be a size
Megan Blanton
Tyler chapman I agree with you
DeleteI think girls are too misled. Or judged too much. If girls think they're ugly, they're attention whores. If girls think they're hot, they're stuck up. I mean I could go on and on about that. I don't understand why girls cry about nothing and guys don't. I don't understand why girls look in the mirror and see a 500 pound person, and why guys look in the mirror and see a buff, perfect, Calvin Kline model. (That's probably not even true but whatever) Girls are just generally more emotional than guys I think.
ReplyDeleteAfter watching the Dove Evolution with the makeup transformation and the sketch artist, it just made me appreciate how I look. My mom once sent me a link to a Victoria secret ad type thing and it had pictures of these "flawless and hot" models without makeup and photoshop. And let me tell you, they were no were near their Victoria secret catalogue pictures. I mean some of these girls had acne, rough looking skin, and very...wild natural hair. It also had a caption below and it was talking about how they get spray on abs. They just looked like normal people.
I think girls are more pressured than guys in America today. The movie mean girls really makes me think of this topic. I mean the girls went ballistic over all the negative things that were said about them. Maybe girls are more sensitive because a lot of times girls are labeled as fat, a whore, too faced, too skinny, ugly, etc. I understand guys are called the exact same things but for some reason I think girls take it a lot harder than guys.
Hannah Hyatt
So I will start off as the first boy by saying that no other boy has posted on this blog because they are terrified to be judged as a sexist pig like Andrew did at the mere hint that there is something wrong with girls and not society. The problem is that women care too much about what others think about them.
ReplyDeleteI am going to refer to the other posts by girls first. They say that one problem is that they compare themselves to others too much and put themselves down. Well, let me first say that girls aren’t the only ones that compare themselves to others. Then let me say that comparing yourself to others isn’t a bad thing. Wanting to be as good as, if not better than someone, is what keeps us moving forward. The reason we keep moving forward as a human race is because new people want to be as good as or better than their heroes or “idols” as someone said in an earlier blog post.
As for the lack of participation from women in government, that is no one’s fault. The WCF Foundation link we were given says that in 2008, 54% of voters were women. If they wanted to have a woman to represent them, then they would have it. But who is representing them isn’t the important part; the important part is what that person stands for. It shouldn’t matter what gender or race someone is, but their values. So that 54% is still being represented as they saw fit.
Now for the one that I have just been itching to talk about, the Dove ad. I think it’s silly to get upset and say that the as is trying to say that women should be beautiful and being ugly is a bad thing. I believe the ad is just doing what all ads do in saying “hey if you care about your looks use our product” not “hey care about your looks”. It’s not trying to make you care. It’s entirely your choice to care. If a condom commercial comes on the television is it trying to make you have sex? No. It’s saying “hey if you have sex then use our product.”
My final point is that women are too quick to get offended. This is why I am the first boy to comment: Because the other boys in our class don’t want girls to get upset at them at the first sign of negativity, even though the question itself implies negativity. Girls are so used to the idea that they aren’t seen as equal that they will bite at anyone who points out their flaws. This often causes misunderstandings, such as the Andrew incident, where the girl snaps and gets offended before understanding what the writer was trying to communicate. So instead of showing the two genders are equal, it just makes the girl seem foolish.
I would like to start my end statement by saying that women are in no way inferior to men. But the fact that they have been seen that way for so long and are still seen that way by some people has caused them to be ready to fight at any sign of criticism, constructive or aggressive. They could solve this by just simply relaxing and not caring about what others think so much. There are going to be people to judge you no matter who you are, male or female, black, white or Hispanic. You are going to be judged, so why care?
-The Almighty Shawnathon Thomas “Hope people understand what I was trying to say” Pope
Shawn, you make some good points and some bad ones.
DeleteConsider this post not a total refusal of your statements, but a beautiful rose growing on the misshapen lattice of your less than appealing argument.
A lattice that my nonetheless thorny rose is about to disassemble piece by piece. Or sentence by sentence, as the case may be.
“So I will start off as the first boy by saying that no other boy has posted on this blog because they are terrified to be judged as a sexist pig like Andrew did at the mere hint that there is something wrong with girls and not society. The problem is that women care too much about what others think about them. “
Perhaps you are the first male to comment on this post because no one knows the plight of being a female in modern society better than a female does. As a matter of fact, I think the imbalance in gender ratio between the “What Is Wrong With Boys” post and the “What Is Wrong With Girls” post perfectly illustrates the point I am about to make. Notice the reluctance that boys have to post on the girls' issue, while males and females alike seemed to have equal interest in posting on the boys'. I propose that this is not fear, but a sheer lack of interest. A devaluing. Issues of female rights are placed beneath those of the male all too often. Much like you insinuated several times in your post, we are often told we are merely “Overreacting” because that is “just how women are”.
As for your comment on Andrew's post, the reaction he got was due to the fact that his wording suggested that the opinions contained in his post were his own, when in fact he was using examples of sexism in society to drive his own, (very nice, actually) opinion. Had I not discussed this with him in person, I too would probably have made a post countering him. However, from what we exchanged and what I feel his post was communicating, he was in no way suggesting that, as you say he was, “the mere hint that there is something wrong with girls and not society.” As a matter of fact you completely misconstrued his point. He was suggesting the exact opposite of that. However, I do not wish to speak for him (like you did) and perhaps I am wrong.
He merely made a misstep in diction and neither he nor any of the girls who replied to his post are at fault.
Now for the part that made me want to reply to your post specifically in the first place.
“The problem is that women care too much about what others think about them.”
How silly of us, really! Oh, ha, ha! Light hearted whimsy! You've really cut to the thick of it, Shawn. If only us silly womenfolk had known this all along. When a boy tells me to make him a sandwich for the sake of humor, it really is overreacting for me to tell him I'd like to slit his throat (for the sake of humor, of course.) isn't it? I obviously care too much about what he thinks! What good is caring about peoples' thoughts, anyway, Shawn? It only got us, I dunno, abolition, suffrage.
PART THE FIRST
Yes, the poor girls who cut themselves at night because they aren't skinny,no, not enough, it's their fault for caring too much what everyone thinks. Not the media's. Not society's.
DeleteThe seventeen year old who rips out her own womb with a rusty coat hanger obviously CARES TOO MUCH about being called a slut for getting pregnant. Nobody can know, she mutters to herself in tears. She obviously cares too much about the opinions of those old white men who shut down every planned parenthood clinic in her area because they don't think a woman's body belongs to her. She obviously cares too much about her own body, yes, that's it! Thank you Shawn.
Whoops, I lied.
Maybe, Shawn, it is everyone else who cares too much about what women think? You care an awful lot about what those girls said to Andrew. You care an awful lot what we vicious ladies will say to you poor “terrified” boys. Those old white congressman care an awful lot about about what we do with our reproductive organs, while they plunge their own into their secretaries. (cut that last clause out, Ms. Hill. Too much. Parents are gonna read this.)
Oh, don't think I'm done yet, Shawn. That's only your first paragraph.
(Nothing personal though! I think you're a really cool guy! I just disagree with your post.)
Samantha Hensley
Let’s just get right down to this shall we?
DeleteIn your response you say that it wasn’t fear that was holding boys back from posting on this blog, but instead a lack of interest. I would be inclined to believe you if it wasn’t for the fact that when I had my fellow men read my writing to make sure I hadn’t phrased or worded anything incorrectly, they all congratulated me for my bravery and wished me luck as I posted this as it may “threaten my life” as one of friend, who shall remain nameless, said. Now if thinking they will die isn’t fear then I don’t know what is.
When you started quoting me you used “’overreacting’” because that is ‘just how women are’”. While the word overreacting may have been a poor choice, I only used it because that’s the exact word your fellow women chose to use when I asked what they thought was wrong with girls. As for “just how women are”, I never make that broad generalization because you all are different. I may not have said so because I thought it to be common knowledge that everyone is different. My mistake.
And as for Andrew, excuse me if I gave the impression that I was speaking for him because I wasn’t. I was just using him to support my point. (You know that think you’re supposed to do before you make wild accusations about congressmen and their secretaries….) he didn’t say there was anything wrong with women or women athletics, just that they were overlooked. He didn’t say that he liked it or disliked it; he just made a statement that is unfortunately true. And that statement caused a swarm of girls to get extremely upset. I phrased my statement the way I had to show that girls had posted on this blog previously had all blamed society, forgetting the very important fact that we are the society.
While yes you obviously need to care to some degree to get important things done (abolition or suffrage) there is a point of overreacting. Mutilating your organs because you don’t want a child and to deal with your mistakes could be considered such. While yes Planned Parenthood clinics should be open if the same girl had just stayed calm and thought logically she could have just, uhm I don’t know, go somewhere where the clinics are open! The entire second half of your argument is entirely dependent on emotions and when you just stop and think for a minute, emotions are probably what got the girl pregnant in the first place.
I will give you that your argument for everyone caring about what girls think makes sense. But that’s just because we are going to have to spend the next two years with the same group of girls and our teacher is a girl. So it may be in our best interest to not royally piss them off. You even go as far to prove my overreacting point for me with your comment about congressmen having relations with their secretaries. Which most people would classify as overreaction. Including you seeing as how you even asked Hill to remove that part for you.
My last comment will be regarding your last comment, “that’s only your first paragraph”. Ha. I’m glad you could find all these flaws in my opening statement because you were supposed to! It was supposed to grab your attention and make you want to read the rest of the post where I proceed to explain myself. This would explain why you don’t understand what I was trying to say.
Can’t wait to see your response to this.
(Nothing personal though! You seem like a really nice girl! I just think you should read the full post before you try to argue with it) Master Doctor Shawn Pope
Shawn, Shawn, Shawn...where do I even begin. You said "the entire second half of your argument is entirely dependent on emotions", unfortunately, while this may be true, by writing this reply you did the exact same thing that you criticized Samantha for doing. Your entire reply is solely based on emotion. You do not use a single fact or shred of evidence to reinforce your point, you just continue to ramble about how Samantha is wrong and you are right.
DeleteJust thought you should made aware of this tiny oversight.
(Nothing personal though! You seem like you really liked Samantha's post since all you did was try to imitate her humor!)
Emily Crowe
Okay let's all take a deep breath here. Sean makes an excellent point that it's like as soon as a guy posts something that says something negative, a girl takes things way too far. I believe that a lot of these comments are posted out of anger over something that was misunderstood. Samantha I beg you to please reread the post that made you angry and try to understand the author's point of view. I love you, but please girl just breathe for your sake!
DeleteContrary to what everyone else thinks, I completely agree with your post, Shawn. Mostly because the more societally driven girls do things to be good for society and they DO in fact care about what everyone thinks about them because they're(we're) afraid of rejection by the masses. Nice post. ^-^
Delete-Amanda LeMay
I agree with all of you!
DeleteAll people are emotional, both girls and boys, and we express these emotions in everything that we do. Whether your emotion is anger, pride, or indifference, everyone on this blog has expressed some kind of emotion. Expressing emotions is one trait boys and girls share, they just do so different ways. So really, Shawn and Samantha share similar motives and are just expressing their emotions differently.
Lovely ideas, all of you.
Darby Taylor
Emily, I don't believe you had any place butting in and telling Shawn he had posted something purely out of emotion. What Shawn was actually doing was refuting what Samantha said point by point. Not only did he do that but he also reinforced his original point. For example, "When you started quoting me you used “’overreacting’” because that is ‘just how women are’”. While the word overreacting may have been a poor choice...". Shawn then went on to explain why he choose those words and to show that there was a point in using them (or not using them in this case). Shawn also quoted people to strengthen his point in his opening paragraph (that's evidence right there).
DeleteMaybe you're the one who's posting purely out of emotion because I don't see any evidence backing up your point.
Todd Stetler
I feel popular.
Delete(forgive me, just lightening the mood)
But I feel that I should clarify the truth about the post that started this whole throwdown. Though I did post a rather lengthy response to the sexism pundits qualifying my first comment, I want to reiterate that, as Samantha said, I was only summarizing the issues currently present in society, not attaching them to my personal philosophy. I merely used some regrettably careless diction and syntax, not knowing yet the scrutiny under which my post would be held. It was, after all, one of the first posts on the first thread on the blog.
Now, I will stand by what Shawn said about boys being scared to post anything meaningful. It would have been perfectly appropriate for Hill to provoke all her classes to attack my comment had it been legitimately sexist; however, it wasn't, so it wasn't. To me, getting attacked for a comment that was completely misconstrued (I trust Sam's judgment on sexism) makes it much more difficult to post anything with substance on a gender-related thread. Which is why, already being the notorious sexist pig that I am, my comment on this thread was intentionally inconclusive and vague.
That said, I have to give both of you major props for laying it all on the line.
Master Andrew "I need to finish my GSP essay" Bates
The diverse responses from you all is heart warming. The fact that there are girls using logic and emotion makes me smile. And yes Emily I did really enjoy Samantha’s post, I love to argue and I’m sure that this wont be the only time that she and I have a friendly go at each other. However, I didn't have a response “solely* based on emotion” as a matter of fact I was worried people would think I was an emotionless robot from my response so I’m glad to see that isn't the case. I attempted to use logic to disprove her, if I did or not is up to the public, but I quoted numerous people for this response. I may not have named them out of respect and not wanting to pull them in this if they don’t want to be involved but that just seemed fair.
DeleteIt’s not a “tiny oversight” that I was unaware of, I meant to “ramble” about this because her post was lengthy so I thought it would only be fair to have an equally lengthy come back. You are just proving my point as Samantha did by having a response that is fueled by emotion. As for me copying her sense of humor, I did this for an effect. I was glad to see that Hill noticed this, even if you did not. While I appreciate your input I just thought you would like a reply addressing your concerns.
(Nothing personal though! And I can’t wait to see what you both post next so we can continue this discussion.) Master Doctor Shawn Pope
Shawn, I'm going to be honest with you, only a tiny sliver of my post was based on emotion. I actually agree with some of your original points. The emotion that I did infuse into my post was my naturally sarcastic attitude coming out, and just wanting to support my friend, Samantha.
DeleteWhen I first read your response I have to admit I was a little ticked, What you said actually made sense and that made me mad, but honestly, I have to disagree. My post was fueled by Mrs. Hill telling us to reply to a post and this was the only one that vaguely interested me. So there, I'm being honest with you, your ideas make sense but I have to disagree.
By the way Todd, if my post was butting in, what makes your post fit in so perfectly?
(Nothing personal! Just a simple question.)
Emily Crowe
Emily, if my points make sense then why do you fell the urge to disagree? While I completely understand your want to support Samantha who makes a good argument I don’t see why you have to say I am logically right and then say I’m wrong. It just doesn’t make any sense.
DeleteAs for what Todd said about you butting in, I don’t think its butting in. I wrote this very obviously controversial post to try and spark this large number of responses where everyone could have their input.
Master Doctor Shawn Pope
There is nothing wrong with the idea of exchanging donations for grades, but it is really hard to put it into practice with out someone thinking it is wrong. The people that offer rewards for charitable acts are not doing it just to increase the amount of money they make. That may be part of the reason, but they are also doing it to bring more attention to their cause. Most people would probably donate anyways, but there always those few people that are so selfish that they have to have a reward in order to do the right thing. I like the example Courtnie Carr used, would you still donate to ASPCA even if they didn't give you a free t-shirt? I would, but I'm sure that some people would reconsider. But in the end this t-shirt you got as a "reward" helps you and the ASPCA, you get a t-shirt and the ASPCA gets advertising that may get them that donation that helps to save one more puppy's life. And that's what makes it okay. So to all those people that call this morally unethical so what if people don't donate for the right reason? They are still doing the right thing.
DeleteEmily Crowe
Sorry! I copied the wrong post! What I meant to say was:
DeleteShawn, What I meant I disagree was when you said in your reply that my post being entirely emotion driven, I thought I made it clear that I wrote the post because it was a grade. Sorry if you misunderstood.
I just said that to Todd because he said my post was butting in.
Emily Crowe
Yes Emily, I did misunderstand. You said, “Your entire reply is solely based on emotion” which I have already addressed and disproved. You go on to say “You do not use a single fact or shred of evidence to reinforce your point”. While I did use evidence in the form of quotes from our fellow classmates and sound logical thinking. But if this is what makes a “reply solely based on emotion” then that would prove that your response is just that. You had no evidence on how I relied on emotion and just make your statement without any supporting evidence. So you have proven yourself wrong here.
DeleteI did truly enjoy your post about grades though.
-Master Doctor Shawn Pope
I think that it is just absolutely ridiculous to see how much that has escalated. Really people, stop being so up tight.
DeleteYour welcome,
-Simon Holden
I just simply replied to your post because I thought that it wasn't necessary because all it did was supply one faulty argument against Shawn's fairly strong post.
Delete(Nothing personal! Just thought your post wasn't necessary!)
Todd Stetler
"You are more beautiful than you think," Every girl should think this. What I'm trying to say is you don't need to try to look pretty to look pretty. Girls now wear tons of makeup buy expensive clothes, and spend hours in the morning trying to look good to just go to school. It's school we go there to learn not to look pretty. I'm the type of girl that wears my hair in a ponytail and wears jeans and a hoodie everyday. Yes I do wear make up to special occasions but not for school. I have to agree with Shawn's last paragraph girls need to relax and not care about what others think because everyone judges, yes everyone even you. I say this all the time, If you don't like the way I look, then stop looking. In saying this I mean everyone has beauty within themselves.
ReplyDeleteMegan Blanton
Now that any tension has been cut with a guillotine thanks to Shawn Pope... . Yes I agree that society is to blame BUT there are other factors. Like Thoreau said in his writing "Where I Lived and What I Lived For" Society can corrupt you, it can change who YOU really are. Girls get mixed messages from society " look like this " " no do this" which can hurt a girls self esteem. To stop any misunderstandings this applies to both genders, it just tends to have a greater effect on females.
ReplyDeleteI think the other half of the problem is the average girls personality. It seems to me that most girls worry about WAY TO MUCH.
What most girls worry about:
- Appearance
- Grades
- Social status
- Fitting in
- Relationships
What most guys worry about:
-Food
As you can see there is a difference in the amount of things on these lists. I might be over exaggerating just a wee bit but the point is girls do worry about too much. There are exceptions obviously because some people hardly care about anything.
Society puts some of these worries on girls but there are others they bring on themselves. As for statistics in jobs, government, etc. shawn showed that the gender of voters is about equal so if women wanted to vote for a female in a government position they can and they would probably be elected. Jobs on the other hand are still an is. There are many more unemployed women than men.
A way I see to fix it goes like this. Imagine society is a person, one of those people that puts others down if they arent what they see as acceptable, a ****. Then one day society comes up to you and says your too fat, you need this clothes brand, and they keep ******** at you. Now what would you do? Personally I would beat the living ******* **** *** *************** ******* *** * out of society. If someone said all that to you im pretty sure you wouldnt do it, treat society the same way. That was kind of a violent example but what im getting at is **** society, why should you care about what everybody wants you to do or what they think of you? If you dont care about what society in general thinks about you then that wipes a lot of things off your list of worries. To sum it up do whatever YOU want to do and stop worrying about what the rest of the world thinks. Both genders are equal but each does have disadvantages in todays world.
- Doctor Professor/ Quantum Physicist Robert Todd Cameron Bunyea Chief of the newly reformed Zulu Tribe... With dinosaurs
I rarely point fingers at others and blame them for the reasons as to why I do things because I am able to take responsibility for my actions and choices; so, while excuses are indeed for losers, it’s still safe to say that, as a whole, society is to blame for making girls feel as though they are never good enough. That means you and I are guilty in some way. We advertise the “perfect” images presented by glamorous people and desirable companies in a way that makes them seem like the only right answer. When we ask ourselves “what is wrong with girls?” we don’t typically picture celebrities or well-known females, even though they are struggling to be accepted in all of the wrong ways. They are striving for glamour and success. They are simply trying too hard, just like the so called “normal” girls whom we think are the only ones under pressure.
ReplyDeleteFor example, in a blog post titled “I Weep for Miley,” Trevin Wax discusses how Miley Cyrus and basically all young females in today’s society feel like, without make-up or something they can hide behind, they are worthless. The post reads,
“Picking up a sub sandwich today, I saw a news report on Miley Cyrus’ performance at last night’s VMA’s. I was shocked, then sickened, then saddened.
For the rest of the day I wondered:
What kind of people are we?
What kind of culture have we created?
What do we want our children to be?
No more wondering. Tonight, I weep.
I weep for the little girl who gave us Hannah Montana and became a role model to millions of little girls across America.
I weep for the lostness of a girl who doesn’t see herself stumbling around in the dark.
I weep for the news channels that profit from their all-day coverage of a young woman spiraling out of control.
I weep for the American Idol culture that promises glitter and gold to children, then chews them up and spits them out.
I weep for an entertainment culture that celebrates the breaking of every social taboo and the casting off of every restraint, only then to turn and mock the stars that follow suit.
I weep for the tabloid culture that finds celebrity gossip and embarrassing moments titillating.
I weep for women enslaved by a false view of sexual liberation.
I weep for men (myself included) who have failed to say, “Enough is enough.”
I weep for all the times I’ve looked at women as objects and failed to see them as someone’s sisters and daughters.
I weep for the fathers of Miley Cyrus, Katy Perry, Lady Gaga, Madonna, and all the family members of all the other women who feel they have to sexualize themselves to achieve success.
I weep for my five-year-old little girl, who twirls around like a princess and hugs me tight at night, when I think of the world she is growing up in, the world I will send her into.
DH, Part I
I weep for the broken, messed-up world we live in.
ReplyDeleteBut then I weep for the power of grace.
There’s Jesus, lifting the head of a woman of the night and sending her away into the light. There’s Jesus in a crowd, healing a woman desperately trying to cover the shame. There’s Jesus at the well, transforming a woman tossed aside by multiple men.
Weeping is no longer enough, now I pray.”
Now I want to apologize for sharing that entire post, but I know that’s the only way I would be able to get most of you to read it.
This well-written column elaborates on the idea that women feel the need to cover their flaws and insecurities up in order to feel important. It’s a scary matter when taken into consideration; we are amused by drama and the “different” things about others, when these things are beautiful and unique. I’m sure we have all made jokes about Miley Cyrus and her recent behaviors, but let’s try putting ourselves in her shoes. I am not, by any means sticking up for her, but I’m sure she is going through a lot of struggles, just like many other women, girls, and young ladies in our world.
She is no longer engaged to the man she thought would carry her through life and she is trying to find out who she is, and, even if she weren’t going through relationship struggles, imagine the way she didn’t really get a childhood like we did. She was just tossed into the life of fame at an extremely young age; but we are so eager to judge people and criticize their mistakes, that we scare people away from being themselves, making them want to follow in the norm. We fear judgment and we fear embarrassment, that’s why we do everything possible to stay away from it.
So, whether you’re religious or not, I encourage you to respect others, even if they aren’t like you. The only way we can make girls more confident about themselves is to make them feel like they are worth it in this world, give them a sense of belonging. Pray for them and pray for yourselves; pray that you will be able to notice imperfection and embrace it from her on out.
Thank you and sorry again for such a long post.
-Destiny Hyatt
When I look at both the problems with boy's and girl's, I make one connection between the two. This connection is that they are both competitive between eachother. The thing is girls tend to compete in a different way. They must always look the best, be the smartest, or just think of themselves as a better peson than the other.
ReplyDeleteThe problem is not that they work hard to out work the other. The problem is that when they are just obtaining goals of making other girls look bad. They tend to forget that they must have a larger goal past out performing others. They need one for themselves.
I think its a good thing that girls are so competitive, but when it comes down to it you must have goals for yourself that are high and for you and you only. Many girls work at out performing others but once they are in the real world they are not sure what they really want. They have just worked so hard at making a better appearence as a person, that they have not made themselves better at thier true goals. Many have worked themselves into things like eating disorders because they did'nt think they were skinny enough to look better than others.These things only set them further back.
If girls only worried about the way that they looked at what they trully want, they would be better prepared for the real world. They would not have to go through such desprate moves to become a better looking or smarter girl than the other. Girls would succeed in the world alot more if they could just set better goals for themselves.
-Davis Nesselrode
I have had a lot of trouble answering the question, “What is wrong with girls?”, and for a while I wasn’t really sure why. It was easier for me to answer the question about boys because I am not a boy, and I could just formulate some idea based on what I have seen form an outside perspective. But I’m a girl, and I couldn’t figure out what was specifically the fatal weakness my gender had possessed. What is how emotional girls tend to be? Was it an excess of compassion? The self-esteem issues, perhaps? No, those were all individual, personal issues.
ReplyDeleteWhat if the problem wasn’t with girls as a whole, but the entire culture behind females? In the early 1900s, women were housewives, they cooked, cleaned the house, and raised the children to carry on the family name or to be future housewives. That was their life. In the 1920s, women became obsessed with being different and became flapper girls, publicly rejecting the idea of the perfect wife. When the men were off to war, women started getting jobs, making money and taking men’s place to keep their regular lives going. They fought for rights and for suffrage, and the right for equality in the workplace.
For the last century, women were generally seen in the culture as two things, an obedient wife that obeyed her husband and kept her family running perfectly; or a strong fighter willing to give up the typical American life to have the same rights and responsibilities as men. Now the two have integrated into one idea, and no one can specifically decide on what is ‘a perfect girl’ anymore.
Without that template, girls are judged based on the snap opinions of others and what aren’t faults and weaknesses to one person, may be to another. Thus leading to serious confusion. There is nothing wrong with girls, just the need to have a stereotypical perfect symbol of the gender is the problem.
Erin Chapman
In my opinion, the majority of girls try to be something they aren't. They worry too much about being too heavy, being too skinny, not having enough friends, worrying about being the most popular, or even what brands/types of clothing to wear. Girls don't seem to have a lot of good role models to follow because girls still suffer from an image problem due to the media. They are still trying to convince themselves that being "too skinny" is a good thing when really, all you have to do is forget about the "model body" and just be yourself.
ReplyDeleteSydney Sell
What’s wrong with girls? You could start off by saying we’re too emotion and care too much about what others think of us. We have a high expectation to look a certain way, think a certain way, and to be the best at everything we do. In today’s society if you don’t meet all this “criteria” you aren’t considered a beautiful woman. Society has put an image on woman on how we’re supposed to look; thin body, long hair and perfect skin. In reality, no one is perfect.
ReplyDeleteAs a girl in this generation, it’s hard to deal with society and others girls, too. Girls do everything in their power to feel on top and above anyone else. Jamie Allen, author of 'Ophelia Speaks' author a voice for her peers, knows firsthand how it feels to be bullied as a teenager. Unlike boys, girls use their words to get under peoples skin and since girls care about everything that’s said about them, using mean words seems to be the most effective thing to do.
What should we do about this? What is there to do about this? Society is not going to change, everyone always talks about how terrible society is but we make up society. The people of America make up society, that’s us! What about the bullying? There’s always someone you can go to for help but everyone knows the world is not a perfect, happy, glorious place. There are flaws, everyone’s not going to be nice and that’s something we have to deal with. I don’t think any of this can be fixed, it’s just how the world is and how you deal with it is how the outcome of your happiness is going to be.
Casey Marshall
Girls are such a...touchy... topic, to say the least... So boys.. watch how you word your posts. Ha!
ReplyDeleteSociety has severely damaged the way girls should look at themselves. As time has elapsed, the image of girls has turned into a extreme image that is so far unrealistic it blows my mind. The women betrayed in advertisements and displayed as beauty icons are very beautiful, don't get me wrong, and sure, it's natural for us girls to dream to look that way.. but guess what.. we can't. The amount of photo shopping and fixing done to these women who are displayed to advertise beauty is unhealthy.
Lets take a common toy that I know most of us girls.. and hey, maybe even some boys had... Barbie. Growing up, I know, Im sure others of you, dreamed to look like Barbie when you grew up. that is what I wanted the most.. to be as beautiful as Barbie is. But lets get real... if Barbie was a real person, she would stand about six feet tall with a 39" bust, 18" waist, and 33" hips. If she was real, she would have to walk on all 4's due to her proportions. (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/galia-slayen/the-scary-reality-of-a-re_b_845239.html). and to think I wanted to look like that. Girls grew up thinking that was beauty.. when in reality, it is completely outrageous and unrealistic for anyone to actually look like that.. and for that, I blame society for making Barbie such an icon for young girls.
I am a girl.. and I get it 100%. People judge. I wake up everyday and try to look my best, just to try and avoid the judgments and harshness of society. It's tough. All though I do focus on my appearance quite much, there is one thing I have learned: real beauty comes from within. I know that is a typical response and its hard to back that up with society today... but I am a firm believer that it is true. The people in your lives that will matter the most and will always be there for you are the ones who accept you for what is on the inside and not what you look like. Your looks change.. but you don't.
To close up... girls are pressured so much to be a certain way to be accepted by society.. when all in all, it shouldn't matter. Everyone is beautiful and different in their own ways.
Torey Hawkins :-)
First off, I have to agree with Shawn that, like it or not, guys (myself included) are timid to post on this thread because of the …tenderness of the subject. It’s pretty apparent that this has stifled debate, as there have been but 16 comments since October 17th, and I believe four comments from boys.
ReplyDeleteThat being said, a grade is a grade, so here goes nothing.
Perhaps I can offer some insight as to what it is about boys that seems to prevent such extreme self-image and bullying problems. High-school age guys, as a rule, simply do not cling to feelings. While we possess the palate for emotions like self-consciousness, envy, and guilt, we generally don’t let these emotions decide our entire outlook.
Boys are quick to shake off a bad thought by jovially insulting a friend, dunking exceptionally hard on another, or simply kicking back with the latest Call of Duty (myself decidedly not included). While I have witnessed many a fight between female friends because of a jokingly caustic remark, it seems much more rare in boys. As a boy, you adapt at a young age to shake it off when someone tosses a gay slur in your direction, or tells you your shoes look like those of a girl. It is unclear why small insults can cause major drama for girls but not boys, though I believe this is one of the fundamental differences between the sexes in my generation.
If I were to hazard a guess as to the reason for this discrepancy, it would go back the tendency of boys not to hang on to feelings. Even if a boy were to feel some sting behind an insult, he usually just fires back decisively and then thinks nothing more of the incident. On the other hand, I have observed in many of my female friends a tendency to be visibly shaken by a perceived insult, then say nothing about it for a time, then eventually allow their gradually increasing indignation to bubble over in the form of a long, angry text message or—probably worse in the long run—a heated conversation with a third party about the transgressions of the accused. This quickly becomes a cycle.
This is my very, very deflated two cents in the matter. Clearly, I cannot venture into the mind of the opposite gender, as intriguing as that may be. I offer my observations of the workings of my masculine brain as well as the actions of those around me—take it for what it’s worth.
Andrew Bates
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeleteEven though there are all these campaigns to help girls self-esteems, that doesn't change how time has affected the way girls' brains are hardwired. Girls have been told in most cultures for centuries that they never be good enough. Women were always told that their place was in the house, and that everything else was the men's territory; they were instructed to keep quiet and attempt to be just good enough for the man of the house. I believe that this has changed how the female brain develops especially around puberty.
ReplyDeleteLet's look at the big picture for the moment, we are supposedly told by our parents growing up that we are perfect inside and out. We see all these campaigns that attempt to boost women's self-esteem's. Yet suicide rates and negative self-views are still rising. Why? We forget that women have the instinct now to compare themselves to other women. Yes media plays a part in it but what about the other women that one woman sees in her everyday life? She can't help but compare herself to them. It's part of women still trying to be just good enough like they were told to try to be.
So at the end of the day it really doesn't matter how much "self-esteem" a woman has because that can't really change how the brain is hardwired.
What's wrong with girls?
ReplyDeleteMost of the time girl related problems are connected with emotion, they have a lack of confidence and some have self image issues. This is where most of the problems with girls come from due to the fact that society in general says that girls have to be perfect. This in return causes girls to have a lot of anxiety of what they wear, what they have, and what they do.
An example of this would be if a girl were told her outfit did not look good and then right after the person had said that to them said they were just joking, a girl would be self conscious all day until she could change cloth and if another girl had said this to them there probably would be a fight.
So what’s wrong with girls? Most of them are just not confident.
Drew Dearborn
The problem with us girls in General is we always feel the need to impress. What
ReplyDeleteother people think of us means everything. We live in a very judge mental world,
filled with gossip, drama, bullying, clicks, and groups. Generally stating girls
are all about wanting to fit in. Even if it's forcing you to be someone your
not. You may feel at times that no one knows what your going through or how you
feel. This is why I feel we are never on the same page.
I find that being a girl one of the hardest things to do is trust. Finding one
friend or multiple friends is very important because girls are mean! If girls
didn't care so much and didn't get so involved where they shouldn't be there
would not be as many issues between each other.
I could say so many things I love about being a girl, but in reality it's a
harsh world. Most girls have a very low self esteem finding it very hard to believe in them selves when it comes to anything. Worrying to much about their weight or how they look tends to play to big of a part in the daily routine of a girl.
Brooke N. Spaulding
As a girl myself, I believe guys think we are emotional and all care about nothing but our looks. But in reality we just want to be excepted so we will wear anything, do anything or be friends with anybody just to "fit in". Although, almost all girls are formed this way, I don't believe it is entirely our fault. I believe that today's society puts way too much pressure on girls and keeps us from being who we truly are because it seems to us we are under a microscope constantly being inspected. That is why it takes a lot for a girl to say oh what the heck I'll be who I want to be and I don't care who judges me, in reality every girl will say it but none of us actually mean it.
ReplyDeleteThough I do see others points and see why someone could disagree with me in the point that girls are being judged because we aren’t the only ones judged in society today but I do believe we are the most judged. I can see because I'm coming from the perspective of a girl myself someone could disagree. But who better than a girl, herself to tell you everything wrong with us.
All and all though we girls are a mess we are emotional, crazy, stressed and self-conscious. All these defective personality traits make us the messed up human we are. But as humans we would be lost without each other.
Ashton Chaney
I agree with Ashton in the sense that we girls are “under a microscope” in society and that we all just wish to be accepted. I will be completely honest and say I don’t think highly of myself. Most people say that we “dress to impress” and I think that, most of the time, the only person I’m trying to impress is myself and by that I mean that I’m trying to give myself more self-esteem and confidence. Yes, I will admit that a lot of times we do dress for others around us so that we can fit in but that’s just what we’re expected to do. We get ridiculed if we walk out in public looking like crap and so to prevent that we try to impress society by dressing up.
ReplyDeleteI also believe that the campaigns that are meant to boost women’s confidence are only partially effective. We tend to seek out these types of campaigns to make us feel better but it’s pretty much useless considering how many times we’ve said “I’m not good enough” to ourselves; it’s impossible for us to think otherwise. I think that the only thing anybody can do to help women in general is to leave them alone about how they look, and how they act. Let us be who we are so we don’t have to hide ourselves and be afraid of being judged.
Taylor Moreland
I think the biggest problem with girls is that we compare ourselves to the women around us. Girls don’t need comparisons, they need role models. Women like Victoria Woodhull, who was the first woman to run for president in 1872. She went from rags to riches twice, and was an advocate for basically all the things women enjoy today. In flipping 1872. Like Natalie Portman, who went to Harvard. If she wasn’t an actress she would still probably have a pretty good job and life. Like Jennifer Lawrence, who once wore no make up to a premiere and proved that you don’t need make up to look beautiful. Like Demi Lovato, who overcame her depression and is now a leading advocate on how girls don’t have to be perfect. There are plenty other beautiful, intelligent women, past, present, and future and they all advocate the same thing: that you don’t have to be perfect.
ReplyDeleteGirls need to stop comparing themselves to the world around them and start being comfortable with who they are. Which means stop trying to fit in and conform to what society thinks is pretty. They need to realize “You is kind, you is smart, you is important.” (The Help) Being pretty should be the least of girls’ concerns because if you are good enough for yourself, then everyone else shouldn’t matter. You are all you have in the end. The previously stated women represent what I believe women should strive to be. Ambitious, intelligent, authentic, and strong. Are they beautiful? That depends on who you ask, but they are role models, not comparisons. Whether you are a girl or boy, the way to make yourself the best that you can be is to strive to be a role model for someone else. Would you rather a little kid to walk up to you and say, “I want to be like you when I grow up” or “I want to look like you when I grow up?”
Dove DeNigris
I am in complete agreement with this blog post and I must say that it is definitely inspiring an effective. I love how Dove included famous women who have worked to make a stand and help to inspire their fans who idolize them. I would have never even thought about these women as I wrote my post.
DeleteI also agree with the statement "...if you are good enough for yourself, then everyone else shouldn't matter. You are all you have in the end." Frankly, I agree with every single part of her post and would just like to commend Dove on this brilliant post.
Taylor Moreland
I am going to start out with saying that girls care way too much about the little things. I being a guy can only say this from what I’ve observed. I have a 12 year old sister and I’ve noticed that she will freak out on little mistakes that happen. She blows them out of proportion. I believe girls do this because they feel like they have to outdo anyone else and just be better than anyone else. I’ve also noticed that girls are extremely competitive which also when they notice someone is better than them at something. But, me being a guy I can’t really say if any of this is exactly true, I can only base this off of observations, and observations are not always true.
ReplyDeleteConner Nelson
Pinpointing what’s wrong with girls can be hard. Is it the pressures of society? Or perhaps we’re too insecure? Nonetheless girls, as a general rule, have high expectations as well as high aspirations for themselves and sometimes those expectations are a little too high. For example, most girls aspire to be beautiful and there’s noting wrong with that at all. I think the problem arises when we try so hard to look like an unachievable picture of an airbrushed model from a magazine. This is also where the problem of “not good enough” stems from. As girls, we start to feel like we’re not pretty enough or thin enough or popular enough when we don’t match up to the image of a celebrity or some other respected figure. We pick out our flaws and dwell on them rather than remembering we were all created to be individuals with a purpose and we’re perfect the way we are. Self love can be one of the hardest lessons to learn but I think it’s one all of us should learn.
ReplyDelete-Courtnie Carr
I believe that the biggest problem we need to address here, are the questions being asked- "What's wrong with girls?" and "What's wrong with boys?". I completely understand what the question is trying to get us to talk about, but the answer simply is: There is nothing wrong with any of us- we are all beautiful and wonderful in our own ways- however, what is wrong, is that we, (both girls and boys), are put under outrageous stereotypical roles from society and are expected to live up to them; both good and bad stereotypes.
ReplyDeleteGirls are stereotyped to have perfect skin, be super skinny, have our whole lives figured out, and for our ambition in life we are supposed to be teachers, cooks, or stay-at- home mothers. Then, if we don't succeed at those things, we are expected to be depressed and act like are never going to live up to anyone's standards. We are supposed to be weak.
Ladies, we are strong. we should never be unhappy with what we look like, or what "click" we are in at school! If we do not like what this world has "made" us into then we should change the "girl stereotype". I know that is way easier said than done, but most of us girls (myself included) look at these girls who we are "supposed" to look like, and we hate them. We hate them because they are a size 0 and we are not, we are jealous. But in reality those girls who we see on TV, they have worked hard to get there, and I bet they have just as many insecurities as we do and I strongly believe that many of them are jealous of our normal lives.
As girls, there may be something wrong with us, as a "whole". We are stereotyped and we will never be able to change that- if we don't start looking at ourselves and others with confidence and love. Individually we are amazing, we are strong I would love to see our "stereotype" as a whole changed so when the world thinks of girls they think- Women are strong.
1 Peter 3:3-4 says:
Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious.
Song of Solomon 4:7 says:
You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you.
Challenge to live life with confidence and selflessness.
-Amber Booth
What's wrong with girls, I think it's the same thing that's wrong with boys: nothing. There's nothing wrong with today's teens of either gender. What's wrong is society. Society gives us ideas that we should be 100 pounds and 5' 10". This isn'n even feasible for most girls. Honestly, I don't think most girls want this anyways. Personally, I'm happy not being 100 pounds and 5' 10". I think girls should stop believing that pleasing society is the right thing to do. It's not possible nor is it healthy. So to recap, nothing is wrong with girls; what's wrong is society. And it needs to change soon so girls can relax and be happy in their own body.
ReplyDeleteEmily Crowe
As Erin said, nothing is wrong with girls. It’s society. Society is CRUEL. Girls try to meet the expectations that society has on us. As in, being skinny, having the perfect complexion, etc. This tends the “popular” girls to not associate with the girls that don’t meet the criteria within society. Being friends with someone, and having a boyfriend shouldn’t depend on the needs. It’s all about your personality. Society puts pressure on one to meet expectations. No girl should be self-conscious with their selves. It brings girls down, when they should look at themselves and think they are their own person and are beautiful. God made everyone different and society has put girls to be self-conscious. “For every creature of God is good and nothing to be refused, if it be received with thanks-giving.” 1 Timothy 4:4. All girls should be confident within themselves, and don’t let their physical appearance convey them down. Society is what is wrong with girls.
ReplyDelete-Sierra Smith
Most girls are just insecure. They see only flaws and not their true self. They want to please everyone and make them happy no matter the consequences. Not all girls feel this way but generally the thoughts that go through their head are something along the lines of "I'm not good enough." We want to be perfect to everyone. We don't want to accept that everyone has flaws. Some girls see celebrities and models and aspire to be like them. That seems to lead to eating disorders.
ReplyDeleteGirls won't admit it but we all want to seem perfect. I'm not sure who sets the standard of perfection but I don't think it matters. We want to be better than everyone else and have the nicest things. We'll see girls with the newest iphone, coach purse, or Ugg boots and a part of us want to have those things too because it gives us a sense of equality or popularity.
Some girls would disagree with my accusation because they feel they get those things because they actually like them, and that's okay. I'm not saying every girl is like that. Mainly because they aren't. Girls do buy things because they like them and they start a "trend" that everyone wants to be a part of. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, but girls shouldn't feel like they have to get the newest things because they are considered "cool" or because "everyone has them." Our self-esteem is just too low and we feel like if we don't get the most expensive things to fit in, we feel as if we will stand out in a bad way.
So all-in-all, The question "What is wrong with girls?" I feel can simply be answered that we are self conscious and want to be perfect in every way we can.
~Ashleigh Johnson~
What’s wrong with girls? I personally think nothing is wrong with girls. Lots of people would say that they are sensitive, self-conscious, and/or overreact to certain situations, but the real problem is that they try too hard to be perfect. Perfect is having all the required or desirable elements, qualities, or characteristics; as good as it is possible. The thing about being perfect in today’s society is you can’t be. Not all girls are the same and their determination to be perfect affects each girl differently. This determination can be a girl’s strongest asset or their biggest weakness. It is always good to strive to be the best, but some girls will beat themselves up for not being the best.
ReplyDeleteSociety puts an awful image in girl’s heads that perfect is pinched, saturated, smudged, blurred, and repaired (Photoshop terminology) girls in magazines and TV ads. It is not just affecting teens it is also affecting young girls to. My sister came home one day from school and told me she needed to lose weight because she was 20lb heavier than other girls in her class. She joking talked about throwing up and I had to explain to her that she was heavier because she is taller and that she was already underweight. My sister is 10 – not even in middle school yet - she is already worried about her weight.
It is also depressing to say that some girls feel most like themselves pretending to be something they are not. Let me just say that we were all created by God so in a way we are all perfect. We shouldn’t worry about the superficial things in life.
Tariq Onodu
I wouldn't say there is something "wrong" with girls, but it all of us girls have different reasons as to why we behave certain ways. We always feel accountable to someone or ourselves, so everything has to be perfect or else we don't feel good enough. Girls love and want to be pretty, skinny, wanted and loved. Which are not bad things, but you don't sometimes always get what you want, but making the best of what you do have.
ReplyDeleteFor me as a girl, I always try to be a rule model in everything I do for my cousins. It is a lot of pressure; but life is worthless without hope and something to live for. Competition and comparison to my opinion is what girls try to deal with in a day-to-day bases; we always want to be as or better than someone. Those girls that are not able to accepted themselves for who they are, find it difficult to "fit in"; therefore loosing their self- esteem. We are all humans and no one is perfect, love you and being the best that you can be, is an accomplishment.
We girls just need to take a moment to acknowledge the fact that we are all individually and specially crafted by God; not letting anything and anyone bring us down, but bring out the best in us.
P.S.
Nerisia Ngum
What IS wrong with girls? They worry about beauty and, friends and, overall perfection. You constantly hear in the news about girls in high schools around the nation that have gone on extreme diets or are cruelly excluding and bullying other girls. Finally, the seem to me to be completely focused on making themselves as beautiful as possible. I think that there is nothing wrong with this situation except the fact that most girls need to wake up and smell the coffee because there are more important things in life than superficial things. One must be trying to prepare for your life ahead, and bickering with each other or putting yourself down, will not help that.
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, as said before by several people, boys apparently don't care about a darn thing in life, but at least we do what is important. A lot of the time, girls will spend their entire lives trying to stay afloat in the eyes of society while they sink into a hole that they can't dig themselves put of. Secondly, we take what society says about us with a grain of salt, because it is of the most vital importance that you are who you naturally are, it is not good to beat yourself up about the hand that you have been given. Finally, I have to bring to attention the fact that girls are destroying themselves. You see things like the Dove ad which portray girls who feel bad about themselves and put themselves down. This makes me think that they began to think this way because they were pressured by other girls to find the perfect beauty while all along they had it without any makeup or hair products.
Girls are in a bad way, today in this time and place. They see themselves as inferior to others and even go to the extreme to point it out to their peers how "awful' they look. It is a sad situation, but the only thing that has an effect on the problem is an effort from every woman. They must see beyond the superficial things that they think are so important, and actually succeed in life.
-Simon Holden
I can't exactly say what is wrong with girls, as I am not one. However, I can speculate, and if I were to do so, I would most likely conclude that nothing in particular is wrong with girls. Everyone has their problems, whether they are male or female, but that doesn't mean that there is anything "wrong" with anyone. The way in which these problems manifest themselves in girls, however, is rather startling, which gives cause for alarm. According to the Miss Representation website, "It is estimated that out of the 8 million people with an eating disorder, 7 of those million are women." Self-harm and depression are other prominent examples of the manifestations of the problems that girls face, neither of which is salubrious to oneself. To make matters worse, the media spends so much time showing the world what a "perfect" woman is like, but not enough time showing the problems that many women face thanks to the media's own influence over our society.
ReplyDelete"3 out of 4 teenage girls feel depressed, guilty, and shameful after spending 3 minutes looking through a fashion magazine" (Miss Representation Website). The fact that 3 minutes of looking at a magazine can do such a thing to anyone is frightening. Society has put so many pressures on different people, and the weight of these pressures can be hard to handle, especially for teenagers. What's worse is that these pressures are useless, as they bring about false images of how girls, and guys, are supposed to act so that they can "fit in" with the rest of society. So, to rephrase my previous statement, I believe I would conclude that there is nothing wrong with girls, but our society, on the other hand, is wrong, and it would be beneficial to all if society were to make some positive changes.
Will Grasch
I’ve honestly been staring at my computer screen for at least 10 minutes now trying to figure out what to say. I occasionally write a sentence, stare at it for a few moments and then promptly delete it because I’m quite sure that it wasn’t right. The problem is I don’t know what is the “right” answer because there is no “right” answer.
ReplyDelete“What’s wrong with girls?” is such a broad question and every answer is true in some regards. Part of the reason I’m struggling to write this post is because as a girl (or any human being for that matter) I care what others think and I expect a lot of myself. Therefore I’m going to join the bandwagon of people who are saying that girls try to be perfect and be this false image of themselves because in some regards it is true.
I’m definitely not satisfied with my answer or lack thereof but my thoughts reflect so many of the previous posts that I’d rather not be a broken record. Though I did take the liberty of asking Siri what she thought was wrong with girls but she “can’t say.” So in following Siri, who knows all the answers, I can’t quite say what’s wrong with girls because sadly, I don’t always know.
Harper Jones
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeleteI feel like the main problem with us girls is that we are to emotional, when it comes to reacting to the things that we hear. I will agree with Sierra and Erin in that, society is CRUEL but if girls didn't care as much about what others that about them they wouldn't have as many problems. Girls tend to invest their emotions in others, and when the investment goes bad girls get overly upset. I used to have this problem, where if anyone I trusted said or did something to hurt me I would exaggerate the situation. But I have realized that it isn't worth it, it isn't worth getting up set over something silly.
ReplyDeleteI will also say that many girls crave attention from atleast someone in there life whether it be a boy at school or friends or parents. The attention can somethimes relive girls of stress. Girls like to feel wanted or needed in most cases, when a girl feels needed it makes her feel important, and when a girl feels wanted she feels desirable. Since these issues can be fixed I feel that girls should care less about what society thinks and more about what they want (:
~Taylor Gilbert
The question to answer is not, "What's Wrong with Girls?” but "What Has Society Done to Girls?" Posts that have been written, list what society does or how society views girls in general.
ReplyDeleteConversations struck up when people made generalizations about boys; so how is writing about girls or what we add to our writing as a whole any different? Gender aside, it is proven that who you surround yourself with, their actions tend to rub off on you. Many people don't want to claim that their impressionable; to say so would be a weakness in their eyes. I myself agree, I don't want to say that those around me leave an impression, an impression so great that my actions mirror theirs. I want to be "Myself". (That in itself is a humorous thought. When you think about it, when if ever do you really know who you are?)
Society in the United States is about the "Perfect Image", from comer stores to huge malls, there are images of the idealistic people, couples, and families. The one obstacle of the perfect anything is the sentence that our parents always said, “You Can Be Anything You Want to be." That sentence is the curse of the perfect image.
You would think that it would be the fuel to the fire for the perfect image. Sadly if you don't bend to the guidelines set before our time, you are pushed aside and forgotten all because you strive to be yourself. This goes for male or female. How many times have you heard of a son taking over the family business? How many times have you heard of a daughter going into a field that suits more to societies liking then to her own? She chose this profession all because she didn't want to be labeled as "Different". These examples go for anybody, boy or girl.
For generations men were considered the breadwinners, women were the homebodies. Not only were the roles set in stone for the adults, but even the children from kindergarten to high school, had personal obligations to their families to be seen as the "normal, ideal household," My grandmother remembers going to school in dresses and skirts, making sure that skirts covered her ankles. Whereas today, individuals dress to the bare minimum.
Slur words to describe "unruly" girl behavior where whispered under breaths and said behind closed doors. Truthfully these behaviors are nothing that is standards for today. To even be associated with these girls brought the harsh rumors on you. You may laugh, but just look down the school halls, the actions being displayed is beyond the imagination of the past generations, let alone the words that we throw at each other every day.
To criticize any gender for behaviors is unethical, when really you can't call anyone "Normal". When you peel back the layers to the bare essentials, the norm for society is different for every individual.
*Mikka*
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeleteThis is definetely a tender subject, so I'll attempt to word my post carefully. I believe that several of the issues that every single girl has to endure is a result of history. Women have always been held in a lower regard that men, therefore they are very judgemental of themselves. Men would "show them off" like they were property, gleaming about having the most attractive spouse.
ReplyDeleteGirls are also more expressive about their emotions than guys are. When a guy flashes another with an insult, the victim typically returns an insult, then the incident is forgotten and they move on with their lives. On the other hand, girls (from my experience and observation) tend to take insults very personally, and hide how it makes them feel. Even if they comment made about them was intended to be harmless, girls take it to heart. They think about the comment and hold grudges against those who made them.
Society has also greatly influenced the mind of young girls. Propaganda everywhere emphasizes outward beauty such as, having curves, being tan, thigh gaps, being skinny, etc. Because of its major occurrence, these portrayals of women seem "normal" to the average person. Everyone becomes more judgmental of girls, including themselves. They all have a desire to look like these women on tv and in magazines. This is a major cause of self esteem issues in young girls and a source of inflicting self harm.
So what's wrong with girls? Absolutely nothing, the real question is: what's wrong with society? Girls are not at fault, it's society's emphasis on glamour, sex, and perfection.
-Chris Hughes
I’m going to phrase my response to “what’s wrong with girls” under the presumption presented by Chris Hughes and many others that there isn’t anything wrong with girls, there is something wrong with society. So, what’s wrong with society in the way it treats and thinks about women?
ReplyDeleteMy first point can be found in the Girls on The Run campaign website. The first thing you see when clicking on the link is a hot pink logo, and two girls standing together surrounded by clip-art butterflies and flowers. In my opinion, by representing women in such a way, these campaigns are only furthering the stereotypes society has put on women since the beginning of civilization. Butterflies and flowers are fragile beings of nature, just as society has always told us women are. If we continue to associate “girly” things like flowers and butterflies with girls, these stereotypes that so any groups are fighting against will only continue.
My second point is found in the way media depicts women. Every time a young girl in the US flips on a TV she is bound to see a commercial for makeup or beauty products, a model, or an over-sexualized TV persona. These have a great effect on how many young women feel they should be seen; not as intelligent, but for their sexual appeal. Many groups in the past 20 years have emerged to battle these damaging media messages such as the Dove Campaign for “normal” women. These campaigns have had some success in battling these media messages but lack in effectiveness as they still create a section of society just for women, instead of integrating everyone in efforts of equality.
To wrap up, when society says “girls are this” and “girls are that”; whether what they say is positive or negative it will still continue to contribute to self-esteem and achievement deficiencies in women. Until we learn to include everyone, not just the majorities or the minorities, we will never achieve equality for everyone.
Sidney Cobb
I agree with a lot of what you've said. You made some really good points, especially regarding how backhanded sites like Girls On The Run are, even if it's not intentional. Using symbols like flowers and butterflies to symbolize girls show how girls are portrayed in society. Flowers and butterflies- pretty, but weak and fragile. Nice to look at, but mostly useless. That's what's wrong with the view of girls.
DeleteDiana Rudic
I think people care to much, seriously I’m a girl and ill tell you right now. If you just sit back and watch our world is a bunch of crazy lunatics waiting to put a damper on your day. Girls and boys both face plenty of problems, I just don’t think it affects any certain gender.
ReplyDeleteAs a female I have realized that the female raise feed off of other females down ward spiral. So I would rather surround my self with my best friends who are GUYS because they honestly don’t care about what I wear, who I talk to or anything else. As long as I’m me they don’t care. So I don’t think its as much what’s wrong with girls, as much as it is how girls treat each other. Seriously though think about it, we all judge each other, girls just judge harsher than guys do.
So I think if our human raise just would QUIT JUDGING AND CRITISING each other we would all get along fine J. seriously though sit back and watch. Look around you I bet you will realize just how messed up WE ALL ARE.
_Jennifer Lynn White (quit judging the people you love. its rude)
I feel that in our society today women are mostly judged on their appearance rather than their intelligence or insight. The main thing that I believe is wrong with girls is our outlook on life and how we decide to live it.
ReplyDeleteThere are plenty of girls in our school who love to get involved in drama and that’s what people know them as. Then there are the girls who are quiet and not out going, people peg them as the weird ones. In high school especially there are a ton of stereotypes that are given to girls and all those stereotypes do is tear down their self-esteem. From the sources listed my favorite is the Miss Representation Project. The video on this site shows female empowerment and how we as a society need to adapt to change and show full equality to genders. In some ways you could call me a feminist because of the fact I stand strong for women and know we can change the world without the help of men.
Girls need to stop feeling the need to be so perfect. A lot of us feel that we need to meet some expectation to impress people. The reason we can’t be taken seriously is because of our looks and “unstable” emotions. Although the emotional part may be somewhat true, as females we can’t let the opinions of other people get to us and lower out confidence. In one of the dove campaigns it shows an image of what you think you look like compared with what others think you look like. I love this campaign because it promotes to all women for them to know that they’re beautiful in the eyes of everyone.
In conclusion, I do feel it’s time for not just a change but a movement of female empowerment. It’s time to show the world what we’re made of! Men may disagree but we all know behind every great man was a great women.
Lexie Richardson (:
What is wrong with girls? I believe us girls have a tendency to go out of our way to impress people. We want to be their idea of “beautiful”. We worry about the clothes we wear, how our makeup looks, how our hair is done and so on and so forth. All though we shouldn’t constantly worry about all that its kind of like we have to. Basically in the girl world it’s like everyone is out to get one another. You’re constantly getting beaten down by peoples words. The problem is people often judge you on your appearance rather than taking the time to actually get to know someone. If you don’t meet the persons standards visually they normally won’t wait around another second to get to know you. That being said, we began to notice our every flaw and obsess over it.
ReplyDeleteSociety also plays a big part on what’s wrong with girls. If you take a look at several celebrity role models they are all the same; extremely thin, no curves, basically flawless. We look up to them! That is societies idea of beautiful so we need to fit that definition as well. What most of us don’t realize is that those celebrities don’t normally look like that. They have had hours of hair and makeup and personal trainers to make them “beautiful”. I honestly believe every girl is beautiful in their own unique way and that we should be comfortable in our own skin.
Heather Fry
I think that the biggest problem with girls in todays society is the pressure that pop culture puts in them to look pretty to fit in. It leads down a very dark road full of bullying and many psychological problems.
ReplyDeleteI get it nobody wants to look like they just rolled out of bed, went dumpster diving, then crawled through a mile a mud before school, but there is a limit, moderation is not a bad thing. You don't have to pile on the makeup to the point where you like a clown (hint hint if you can scoop it off with a spoon that's called caking and despite what you think its unattractive). Even Macklemore agrees. in his song "Thin Line" he says, "the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing women that hey look better in their makeup". Don't get me wrong a little bit is okay but there is that thin line to it.
There's also this desire to be over six feet tall and weigh a hundred pounds. That is completely unhealthy. You don't have to be obese if that's what you think you misinterpreting what I'm saying because that causes its own health issues, nut if your so concerned with your weight that you wont eat anything other than crackers go get help, you can be a healthy weight without having to starve yourself. Don't listen to the people that tell you otherwise because what they want isn't the real you.
Admiral General Jacob "Aladeen" Silvernail
There is nothing wrong with girl just like guys, they all face there problems in there own way. Girls similar to guys get made fun of get called names. Saying one has more problems then the other isn't true. Its the people who you associate with describe who you are, and how you develop and what you go through describes who you are. Saying something wrong or they haven't been through have the stuff go through that's not always be correct. The people who are different and aren't afraid to express themselves they should be applauded not ignored that shows heart.
ReplyDeleteRobbie Olson
The main problem with girls is the belief that they have to be perfect. If a girl doesn't have perfect looks, perfect grades... perfect everything, she believes that she will not be successful in life. This causes a huge issue because no one is perfect, so girls are constantly putting themselves down and lack confidence in themselves. Since I am a girl, I know that I sometimes feel bad if I don't look exactly the way I want to.
ReplyDeleteI also think that girls feel pushed harder, especially in school, than their male counterparts. I know that I am pushed to have straight As, and am punished for anything less. This makes me work hard, of course, but I have the drive myself to keep good grades in order to have a good career and life. I think that girls want to work hard, just because in history, the workplace has been male predominant, so they feel that to earn a spot in their career of choice, they have to work ten times harder than boys.
So basically, the problems with girls are the belief of needing to be perfect, a lack of confidence, and the pressures of the world to work hard to earn their place in the world.
Hannah Webber
Society has basically completely destroyed the sense of confidence girls should have. Being a girl myself, I know the constant struggles girls are facing on a day to day basis. From drama with your friends, relationships with boys, even the way you present yourself when you go out in public. Although it is society who puts these daily pressure upon us, I think it's also our need to feel acceptance by our peers and the media. For example, if you're friends start wearing a certain type of shoe, you're more than likely going to go out and buy the same type of shoe regardless if you like it or not. If we see a model on TV, almost every girl asks herself "Why am I not that skinny? Why am I not pretty like her?", etc. By us wanting to feel accepted, we pressure ourselves to make sure we look the way we should or like the things we should. Society paints a picture of how we should be, act, and the things we should like. I think the true question should not be what's wrong with girls but why does society constantly place these pressures upon us.
ReplyDeleteAnother issue that girls have is worrying about what other people have to say about us if we were to be ourselves and not follow what the media and our friends say we should do. Until girls learn how to be comfortable in their own skin, the problem with girls will never be solved.
-Hannah Tice
I have thought long and hard about what exactly is wrong with being a girl in today's world. I can't pinpoint one particular reason, rather I find there are many issues that lead to teenage girl struggles. Could it be that most girls are overemotional and overthink everything? Or could it be how society portrays the "typical girl"? What about the fact that girls have a desire to look and act a certain way that will make them feel "popular" or "accepted"? Personally, I feel ALL of these contribute to girl struggles!!
ReplyDeleteGirls tend to be more emotional than guys and overthink a lot of situations. Because of this, girls create tons of problems that weren't there to begin with. Boys don't bicker over little things and barely ever get involved in drama; while girls are the complete opposite and I think this causes us to be overemotional.
Girls also always want to be something they aren't or have something they can't. For example, girls often complain about wanting a different hair style. If we have curly hair, we want straight; if we have brown hair, we want blonde. We often see what we don't have as being more attractive. Why can't we just be happy with what we do have?
The reason it has taken me so long to post on this blog is because when I find a problem, I always want to find a solution. I was never able to determine a true solution to the struggles of teenage girls. In an ideal world, girls would be less emotional - not care what society thinks of us, and be satisfied with what we were born with. But unfortunately, I'm not sure telling us to do this will truly make a difference. Girls will continue to be girls even if we try to be happy with what we were blessed with. But just maybe we will at least think about how petty all the drama will be in the not so distant future.
Abigale Wilson :)
Girls are a complex bunch. I’ve come to the conclusion that most girls are trapped in a perpetual cycle of trying to achieve perfection, being disappointed and trying even harder or maybe never realizing that perfection is unattainable. The media has painted women to be these majestic creatures, practically flawless, oozing perfection… from the outside. The problem with this is that it’s completely fabricated to simply persuade the population on whatever is being sold or whatever ideas are being promoted. The problem will continue to get worse.
ReplyDeleteThe younger generation is under even more pressure now, what with all the technology they have access to. When girls realize that what they’re striving for is impossible to achieve, in some cases they blame it on themselves, thinking that they are the problem. In academic areas, women most likely push themselves for the same reason they might make sure they keep buying all the latest and greatest clothing and technology- they don’t want to feel outdone or left out by people around them. This isn’t always the case, just like some girls may not feel as much pressure to change who they are. Until girls quit thinking that any particular flaw will ruin their whole self, and until we stop letting the media fool us, nothing will change.
-Emilee Agee
Academically speaking, there seems no be absolutely nothing wrong with girls. It has been statistically proven that they are better achievers in the classroom than boys are. I think one reason why they are better academically is because they are so competitive between one another. If there are a group of girls and one has straight A's, the others are going to try and achieve the same thing so they don't feel like they are left out. Girls in today's generation are so worried about what people think about them that they can never be satisfied with themselves. When it comes to their appearance, girls are quite the perfectionists. Whether it is how they look at school or how they look in an Instagram picture, they will take it over and over until it meets their needs. Girls are also very emotional. If another girl says something rude or offensive it's game on. I just think that girls worry too much about the little things around them instead of looking at the bigger and more important picture.
ReplyDelete-Grayson Arnold
The thing that I feel is wrong with girls is that they always underestimate themselves. Many girls are put down by the many pressures of society saying that "men are the superior sex" and "women aren't capable to do this or that." They try and make themselves better by outperforming men in education. In the two AP classes I am in, most students in the classes are girls. They push themselves to the max to make sure that they are better educated than males so that they will have a huger chance in the near future to have more attendance in the government. If we continue to beat girls down with our words and actions then we are losing a large part of our intellect. If we continue to tell them they cannot be government officials, then we won't have as many caring views towards the things our state and even nation are confronted with daily.
ReplyDeleteEvan Montgomery
There is no question that girls as a whole when it comes to society that we try to portray this image of a typical female, speaking as in maybe petite, tall, long hair, and name-brand clothes.
ReplyDeleteThere is nothing wrong with girls, it's how society makes girls out to be.
Years ago, Marilyn Monroe would be your icon. Although she isn't your average Victoria Secret model, she was still considered a model and symbolize perfection. Nowadays, you don't see the best of both worlds. Yes, there's plus size model things out there but they don't get as much publicity as a Victoria Secret's fashion show. They also do not show the lifestyles the girls live to have that body.
The dove commercial is a perfect example of girls, like anyone we realize our own flaws more than anyone else. We care about how we look and this probably isn't true— but I heard you look ten times prettier than how you think you look. It's all about the self esteem and all a girl wants is to be able to be accepted. And I also believe organizations like Girls On The Run are fantastic because it gives kids a mindset at a young age that they are beautiful the way they are and there's no need to change, if you're comfortable with yourself screw what society makes a typical girl out to be, start a new kind of beautiful.
Ling Lo
So what is actually wrong with girls? I truly believe that females have gained a tremendous amount of respect since the 19th amendment was ratified in 1920. Women are out-performing men academically, they are showing up more and more in the vote for our nation's leaders, and they are quickly taking over the medical field.
ReplyDeleteAs you could see from that, women are very successful. So I ask again, what is wrong with girls? Well, the Dove campaign is a prime example of what is wrong with girls. Girls always feel like they are not good enough, they aren't skinny enough, smart enough etc. They are just filled with self-esteem problems. As a guy, I don't really care how or what people think of me. This is where men and women differ. The Dove campaign is trying to show what they consider are "average" women, and make them see that they are beautiful. This in my opinion is just terrible. They are using skinny women who think that they aren't as pretty as they think they are to set an example for other women. This is making the people that are bigger than them see that the women on the Dove Ad have problems with how they see themselves, which should make them feel worse about themselves.
All in all, women shouldn't have to feel all the pressures society puts on them. The media is full of what the "perfect" woman is like. We are all different for a reason, there is no "perfect" woman, and they shouldn't have to feel that they have to be prettier, or skinnier, or smarter than someone else.
- Dallas Taylor
There's a reason that I have waited to answer this one longer than I have the other two questions. Simply enough, it's because I abjure this question. I think that there's nothing wrong with either sex, and that any comment made about women or men is just a broad generalization that doesn't hold much legitimacy.
ReplyDeleteI don't like this question because many people posting on here are taking observations that they've seen in a small number of cases and using that example to make a loose statement about all girls. I just don't think that's very productive.
As I've said earlier, the problem isn't with girls. The fault lies with society, if with anyone, for thinking that there's a problem there. What if these "problems" with boys and girls really aren't problems at all? What if it's just ways that the different sexes think and operate? All ideas are welcome, but none of us really know.
Cam Newton
When I think of the question "What's wrong with girls?" I think of all the pressures we face today including having perfect beautiful hair, making sure our make up is always on and looks well, being super skinny, watching what we eat to stay super skinny, maintaining all A's, and of course always out doing another girl. We try so hard to chase perfection knowing perfection does not exist. So why do we do this to ourselves? We do it because we strive to be the best at everything we do. Girls are extremely competitive.
ReplyDeleteI believe when it all comes down to it girls do the things we do because we all want to feel wanted and appreciated. By achieving and maintaining good grades our parents are proud of us and we get the satisfaction of knowing they are proud and they appreciate our hard work and efforts. We put on all the make up and fix our hair until it is "perfect" so we get the attention of others. We strive to be skinny as can be so we are wanted by others. Girls want complements, we want to look the best and feel the best. Who doesn't love to be complemented on their beauty? But does beauty really matter? Most people would say no, but ladies lets be honest we care about how we look and that's going to be hard to change. Now I say this knowing that not ALL girls are like this and if you aren't, know you are lucky! However the reason behind our actions is because we want that satisfaction of feeling wanted and appreciated.
The downfall to all this madness is that when we work so hard to reach that "perfection" and we do not succeed it kills our self-esteem. Then we tend to take it out on ourselves, hard. We become depressed and often feel that we are not good enough. Which then leads to horrific acts such as self-harm, eating disorders, and sometimes even suicide. Its disheartening that girls are the way we are.
Girls need to learn to accept themselves for the way they are, the way God made them. Every girl is "perfect" in their own little way. We need to learn and find happiness within ourselves despite all the negative impacts surrounding us. If we truly accepted ourselves for who we really are then maybe there wouldn't be so many problems with girls.
Whitley Bardroff
A better question would be, what's not wrong with girls. Girls might excel higher academically than males, but honestly I have no clue why. I have far better grades than my brothers and everyday my mom says "Boys did you do your homework?", "make sure to turn your stuff in", "do you have any projects?". Wanna know how many times my mom has asked me if I've had homework? None. I rarely even do my homework. So to say that girls try harder and care more is basically saying I'm not a girl. And I am, I can prove it.
ReplyDeleteThis is hard because everyone is different, no two girls are exactly the same and to group them as such is almost insulting. And partially I believe that is a factor in what is wrong with us, we have our own idea of what a girl is and often times don't think to consider others. We get defensive at anything that does not meet our ideal description, we get annoyed and get angry and put each other down. For what? No one knows. Maybe someday in the future people will figure it out, but until then that is what is wrong with girls.
Emily Evans
Hmm... Whats wrong with girls? Well I personally have a problem with makeup. I know that is simple but it is true. Most girls these days crave attention way to much. There is no such thing as "go with the flow." It seems to me that when a girl doesn't think she is popular, she goes out of her natural personality, puts on a lot of makeup, and tries to fit in and be the best.
ReplyDeleteMakeup says "fake" to me. Yeah, a little makeup is fine. But when it looks like you have multiple layers of skin, that is ridiculous. If a girl's dream is to find a mature guy, he will only be mature if he likes you for who you are, not your makeup. Try being yourself. That is what is attractive to me.
On the flip side, there are a lot of things that girls do that amaze me. Not going to lie. Girls go through a lot of pressure. They put up with so much. They are emotional... but they still get good grades AND participate in an extra curricular activity. But when it comes down to it, if you want our attention, be yourself and stop worrying about how you look.
Corey Rogers
I think that the question shouldn't be "what's wrong with girls" or "what's wrong with boys" because the gender is not the problem but it is simply trying to live up to the standards of society. It's almost ironic people striving to make themselves beautiful so they fit in, in a society that's ugly.
ReplyDelete"Try not to take others opinions of you to heart, for what they think is a reflection of them and not of you."
-anonymous
When talking to my friends (of both genders) I often ask why they care, what people think about them. Why do others opinions affect who you are? I believe both genders strive to fit in but, due to the pressures of society, girls work harder at it.
I hate standards. I think that people try to live up to others standards, when in fact, people are not standard. This is our problem. Einstein had the right idea saying "everyone is a genius, but if you judge a fish on its ability to climb a tree it will live its entire life believing that it's stupid." If we use others opinions an ideas to set standards for ourselves we will live our entire life believing that we are not good enough.
We have no place to judge others because we are not perfect ourselves. The solution, even though it's not as simple as it sounds: do what makes you happy and forget the rest.
-Courtney Woodyard
When I was given the task of responding to the question “What is wrong with girls?” my immediate thoughts were: What? I don’t know? Does anybody? But the more I thought about it, the more in depth my thoughts became. There’s nothing wrong with any girl physically, every single girl in this world is beautiful just the way they are and don’t let anybody tell you differently. The problems with girls are social, mental, and psychological.
ReplyDeleteThe social aspect of the problems with girls is the cliques that everyone is split up into at our school. They’re split up by clubs, or how long you’ve gone to school with the people. It’s not fair. I have personal experience coming from Second Street and moving to Bondurant for sixth grade. It was the toughest year of my life, there were very few people that accepted me and welcomed me because I hadn’t previously been a part of their “friend group”. I feel like everyone should always give new people a chance, always try to welcome the new students. You never know they could potentially turn into your best friend. Don’t limit your-self to who you’ve known for the longest, try new things those people may not stuvk around after high school.
The mental side of things comes from girls bashing themselves. Negative body images kills the way girls look at themselves. We pay too much attention to the stereotypical models or “beautiful” girls. We try to turn ourselves into one of them because we end up telling ourselves that that is the only way we’ll be accepted. Girls starve themselves, work out for unhealthy amounts of time, or try to cover up flaws. It’s not worth it and we realize that eventually. But we do it to ourselves.
The psychological side is kind of connected to the mental part of it. Girls will always be judged. Skinny=Dyslexic, Fat=Ugly, Blonde Hair=Stupid, Blue Eyes=Beautiful, Good Grades=Geek, Bad Grades=Stupid, Virgin=Goody Good, Not a Virgin=Slut. We can’t win. We are judged by each other for everything we do. Good or bad, you’re being judged. We end up bashing each-others reputations to make ourselves feel better, but it doesn’t make you look better. I promise.
All of this together just completely destroys the way girls look at themselves, and each-other. We need to focus more on where we will be after high school than who we look like we are here, in high school.
-Kali Whitaker
I've been putting off posting on this one for a while, mainly because I'm a guy and I don't feel comfortable discussing problems of the opposite sex because well....I'm not a girl, therefor, I will never fully understand girls in any complete way.
ReplyDeleteSo, what's wrong with girls? Many problems that girls, as well as boys have, are a result of the society in which we live in. For example, our current society values looking good, and because of that, some girls may worry about their appearance. What people worry about is basically what society says people should worry about. If we declare a certain trait as “good” in our culture, people that follow our culture and traditions will generally try to obtain that trait because it is “good”.
People will always have problems, some will be because of natural tendencies and desires, however, the larger portion of problems will result from society's standards. With all of this said, the more important question should be “What's wrong with society?”.
However, A person can't really fix a “society”. It just doesn't happen, it's a natural born monster that will result over time from any group of people gathering. But the one thing you can fix is yourself. If you rid yourself of the roots, the expectations and responsibilities, the standards, and all the things society throws upon which consume life, then you can be free. You can live life the way you want to live life.
--Coleman Williams
Honestly and truly there isn't anything wrong with girls. They are just pressured by society to look perfect. Sorry for the people that have said this or anything similar. I should have been on earlier, but what can you do ?
ReplyDeleteFirst of all I'd like to leech off of Corey about his makeup comment. LADIES YOUR FACE IS NOT A PAINTING CANVAS. Do not put a massive amount of makeup on, it just looks ridiculous at a certain point. Sorry if I have offended any of you it wasn't intended to do so.
So as I have said earlier about society pressuring girls to look perfect, I think Victoria secrets and other clothing brands are a perfect example. I mean in the commercials they show extremely attractive women, that are nearly naked wearing the product. It just sends a signal to girls mind that they have to look like that. So they go to the extremes just to look "perfect".
I honestly do not see how you girls can handle this much amount of pressure. I give kudos to all of you. Take a breather once an a while.
-Nick Raymond
I've been sitting here looking for and thinking about a reason on what is wrong with girls, but girls in general, there is nothing wrong. Sure you have the girls that are "cool", ones that try to fit in, and the ones that are completely fine with being them. I admire the girls that just like being them because I am the type of girl that doesn't like to stand out or be made fun of and those type of girls just don't care. Society has made girls out to be something they are not. They put commercials of beautiful women but in all reality, that's not what your typical girls are like nor do they want to be like they.
ReplyDeleteI do not think their is anything wrong with either sex. We all care about things the same. Besides guys like to tell girls they do not know what they are talking about with sports or try to out beat them in sports when really, we care about our sport the same it's just the different passions we have for them. I do believe they are equal when it comes to school and grades because we both have the same opportunity's to be who we want to be and what kind of student we want to be. Like I said, nothing is wrong with either sex, it's just how they present themselves along with society.
-Mackenzee Sawyer
What's wrong with girls? Sorry ladies, but where do I begin? We're judgmental, overly harsh, we have insecurities that turn in to acts of rudeness and criticism. We can't stand society, but yet we conform and do nothing in attempt to change the views forced on us, and that we believe ourselves. We hate being gossiped about by someone, but then we turn around and;
ReplyDeletea) Talk about them behind they're back
b) Tweet about them
c) Criticize their physical appearance or intelligence
d) All of the above
I've gone through these posts and what I see is weight weight weight, the false image of beauty we see and believe in magazines, tv, EVERYWHERE. Believing myself that a size 00, 0, or 2 is NOT what beauty is, why do I feel bad when I have to get a size larger in pants? Or when my butt is eating my swimsuit from last summer? I've been brainwashed. WE have been brainwashed. Whether you're worried about squeezing into a size 2, or a size 12, society should not tell you that what you see in a lingerie ad is beautiful. Why is it that the first time I saw the Dove campaign was in my English class?
Aside from the obvious pains of society, we have the result of it. The insecurities I mentioned that result in criticism. I see it every day, admittedly, I do so myself, but why? Wouldn't it be easier if we didn't care? I wore bright orange/pink/purple pants the other day and literally as soon as I passed a girl in the hallway, she turned to her friend and said, "I hate pants like that". Firstly, at least wait until I'm out of earshot, and secondly, what's the point of saying that? You're just complaining and potentially hurting the feelings of someone else. I've never heard a guy comment on another guy's clothing, hairstyle, accessories and whatnot because it doesn't matter to either the spectator or the subject. I personally believe females judge because of either their insecurities or just because they want a petty thing to talk to their neighbor about. It's shallow. I want to challenge the girls that read this to just set your instinctive judgement aside and see if that gets you in any less drama than it did by talking about how slutty someone is.
This is a HUGE topic to address, and those are just two things that I see are wrong with girls. However, in the words of Forrest Gump, the most simplistic, non-judgmental, non-societal-conformist that the entertainment industry has presented us, "That's all I have to say about that."
Morgan Gay
P.S. Males, quick question out of pure curiosity, why so timid when responding to this post?
The statement "or when my butt is eating my swimsuit from last summer?" just made this whole blog post and my day!
DeleteBailey Bishop
Girls are constantly judged. You're fat, skinny, short, tall, pretty, ugly, a virgin, or a slut. Girls have this ideal picture of what a perfect women is, but in reality society sets us up to fail. We can never be who or what society wants us to be. But the sad thing is we are society. We are the determining factors; we have the choice to change how we view people and how we treat them, but we choose to be hurtful, for the fear of being different. And women are the instigators, we fear that we can't move up in life if we aren't putting someone else below us. Every single person is guilty, we all gossip. We feel like we will have more friends. It's stupid and petty, and social media has only made it worse, it's become easier to single out a person and tear them down. People have committed suicide because of cyber-bullying, guys aren't innocent either but you just see it more in girls. We are hormone driven witches.
ReplyDeleteRachel Blackwell
“What’s wrong with girls?” society is what’s wrong with us girls. Every single girl out there in the world is beautiful and unique in their own way but society just continues to trash a girl’s self-esteem. All of society has said the “best” girls are the ones that are skinny, have the best complexion, being tall, etc. we care so much about what others think of us and how we look compared to the “popular” girls it ends up tearing us up emotionally. In the long run we realize that we were trying to be something that wasn’t really the “true” us. We use the makeup on our face to cover up the real us, we use the clothes on our body to cover up the real us, we try to fit in with people who probably aren’t even our true friends to hide the true us… in the end everything we do we try to cover up the real us. To all the girls out there DON’T listen to society we are ALL beautiful no matter weight, height, complexion, etc. and NEVER let anyone tell you different.
ReplyDelete**Miranda Gunn
Speaking as a teenage girl, I don’t believe there is anything wrong with us; we just have different pressures than boys do. I feel like society defines us as emotional, in competition with everything and everyone and that we worry about our personal appearance too much.
ReplyDeleteWe’re girls, of course we’re emotional sometimes, and we never know what we want. We’re emotional because we’re under a lot of stress as teenage girls and we put a lot of stress in ourselves. The stress that is put on girls because of society leads to issues such as anxiety, depression, anorexia and bulimia.
Society puts so much press on girls to be beautiful, skinny young women. It’s hard for us to be ourselves without being afraid that society will judge us. There’s a saying we all should be living by, “Don’t judge a book by its cover.” but we do.
I believe that having a good personal appearance means to be well kept. Clean clothes, bathed often, brushed hair and teeth and wash your face. It doesn’t mean go to the tanning bed every day, wear a hundred pounds of make-up and wear designer clothes.
Society has claimed that males are better, stronger, smarter etc. than girls. We try to do our best to show we aren’t weak and we’re just as good, if not better than boys are. We compete with other girls about grades, sports and relationships. We have it set in our minds that we need to be the best. Be the best player, get all A’s and sometimes even getting a boyfriend is a competition. Feeling like we have to compete with other girls to get guys attention. Guys usually focus on how small a girl’s waist is rather than her true personality which it makes us worry and feel insecure that we aren’t good enough for them.
So there’s nothing really wrong with girls, it’s the pressures we put on each other and that society puts on us as a whole. Right now we are young and vulnerable to peer pressure, as we grow older I hope that we become wiser and realize it doesn’t matter what you look like, it’s your beliefs, values and actions that really matter.
Hannah Smith
First impressions are everything, in the judgmental world that we live in. This usually entails judgment on our clothing, attitude, and of course outer beauty. All of us worry about how we are perceived visually by our peers. Always asking ourselves, “Do we visually measure up to everyone else?” With the importance of image becoming more prevalent each day, companies based on “improving” outer beauty are now targeting the self-image of both genders. I don’t think that self-esteem problems are limited to females; just that society doesn't place the same focus on men’s self-esteem issues, as it does on women’s. So what’s wrong with women? What makes them the focal point?
ReplyDeleteIn the past, with outer beauty determining social status and relationship prospects, it has been ingrained into our minds that our looks matter, that our looks give us an advantage or disadvantage over others. Females feel as if they are constantly being put under a magnifying glass. Every commercial break, makeup ads run depicting happy, beautiful women, targeting young and old. We know that we don’t measure up to society’s ideal beauty; the beauty depicted in the commercials (a thin waistline and a perfect complexion), and we start focusing on what’s missing, our flaws. We feel like we will never be good enough. This is where the self-esteem issue arises.
So much pressure is put on women to always look perfect, so when it can’t be translated we think that something is wrong with us, when it is not. With frames, height, weight, and features varying among women, it’s unrealistic to compare ourselves to each other. Society as a whole places more emphasis on lofty, unrealistic expectations rather than women finding true beauty in their own individuality.
-Madison Wallace
Girls want what cannot be achieved, perfection. Nobody is perfect yet most
ReplyDeletecontinue to use new "ground breaking" make up or hair products and throw
out clothes because a fashion magazine said to. None of it is ever enough
to please everyone. Some can't deal with the imperfections society and
themselves constantly find and it becomes overwhelming. Although teenage
boys are four times as likely to die by suicide teenage girls attempt
suicide three times as much according to,
http://www.teenhelp.com/teen-suicide/teen-suicide-statistics.html.
The attachment also talks about the choice of suicide by gender. Males are
more likely use a gun and females go with a less violent approach. To me
this shows girls aren't as violent. Even though violence isn't the ideal
way to release anger it needs to be released, otherwise it will build up
inside and the result can be tragic.
Eli Sutton
'm going to start off by apologizing to anyone that might be offended by my response to this question and also say that I am praying for anyone who does get offended, because you have more problems than I do, and I'm barely sane.
ReplyDeleteI'm not going to be cliché and talk about how society is what is wrong with girls. I'm going to go deeper into what's wrong. I think the biggest problem with girls is their insecurity. Yes, society can be a big cause of this but I think girls have there own idea outside of "what society wants" for themselves. Insecurity is literally a killer. Girls would be willing to do crazy things to look a certain way or make people see them as something they inspire to be.
I think insecurity is the deepest problem with girls because of the things people will do to cover it up. The "bullies" or "mean girls" of the crowd are usually the most insecure. They think "maybe if I call her out for XYZ she won't call me out on my insecurity". I get it. I've been there. Insecurity also causes people to one up each other. Some girls, ordinary people you see everyday, will even go to the extent of having excessive sex. And this is where it gets Interesting... Some girls are so unhappy with themselves they Would sleep with their Bestfriends boyfriend. That takes a twisted person to be able to do that to someone. I think that some girls believe that they can only get attention from their body and that's sad.
So, I'm very sorry if this is "you" but I think insecurity is killer when it comes to girls.
- Makayla Hawkins
Hmm... Well, This is an interesting topic to comment on. I haven't put much thought into what is wrong with girls. I have been pretty concerned with what is wrong with the world in general. But never mind that topic. Honestly, I don't think I have a bunch of authority to speak on what is "wrong" with girls per say, seeing as I am a Boy. But what seems to be the recurring topic is insecurity.
ReplyDeleteInsecurity is something that we all experience, whether we like to admit it or not. Both boys and girls have their own insecurities; they are just focused in different ways. There is a fine line dividing the general nature of these insecurities between boys and girls. I believe that these insecurities are just the nature of how boys and girls think, articulated—no, almost translated into a way that our society today can understand it.
This point is one that is somewhat difficult to put into words. I like to think of it with this metaphor (A very weird metaphor at that) There are two puppeteers, one male, one female, both representing the thought process and nature of the gender at the most fundamental level (Pretty weird but it works) controlling two puppets. The puppets are the representation of the puppeteers’ commands, or wishes and desires. These are the people that we get today. Humans are like the puppets, tied with strings to their human nature (The puppeteers), acting in ways that other puppets can understand.
This can be strangely related to Semantic changes in words. The words and the letters that make up the word will never change. But the meaning behind the word can change at will.
This is just a log of some of my thoughts as I brainstormed about the problem with girls, and possibly boys in general. Feel free to further develop these rough ideas.
Parker Buckley
After watching a Ted Talks video on the difference between female and male brains (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rYpDU040yzc), I can conclude it all boils down to how we are "wired", if you will. Daphan Joel, a neurologist, the speaker in the Ted Talks video, shows a picture of a male brain, and a female brain. In the male brain, it shows the words aggression, and sex. In the female brain, it show the words communication, and emotion. Seeing this, it suddenly just clicked. Girls and Guys have different ways of thinking and feeling. Us girls are more emotional, therefor we care way more about anything and everything. Guys are more aggressive, therefor they think it is their "job" to get to the top, to be the best out there in whatever they are interested in. They could never let a girl beat them in an argument, at their jobs, or at sports. Still, after girls taking the lead in education, we still have numerous, overwhelming worries and stresses. Why? Because we have more emotions than males, we show them more, and most of all, we let things get to us more easily. What is there to do about it? Well I believe what organizations are doing now for distressed females is phenomenal. What a great way to help females get their stamina back up.
ReplyDeleteFor those of you females who aren't happy with yourselves because you think you do not measure up to what is claimed to be "beautiful" in todays world, remember you are not ugly, society is.
-Samantha Roberts
It's pretty obvious what is wrong with teenage girls today. Society. All of the
ReplyDeletecompetition, the idolization and the "trying to be better than her" ordeal.
I think it's pretty accurate to say that we all want to look and be the best.
How we do that is by looking up to all these beautiful women, these Victoria
Secret models- that their faces are 100% photoshopped and they're 60 lbs.
underweight. According to psychologytoday.com 56% of teenage girls have either
acted on hurting themselves, or have had harmful thoughts. This is 3% more than
what it was in the 1990's. Why? Some studies show it's due to stress. All the
things a teenage girls has to balance out in her life can be so overwhelming, we
nor our hormones can take it. So we act on it.
I strongly blame the harmfulness, low self-esteem, idiolization and
competitiveness we have against each other on media. I believe it's something
that definitely needs to be acted upon and take a turn.
Lauren Knarr
Honestly there are a multitude of things that can be said about “what’s wrong with girls”. I think there also a lot of people that can be blamed (uh hm... men), but at the end of the day it’s really our own personal issues that we neglect to deal with.
ReplyDeleteIf you do believe that women still face social construction I think that it is their own fault. If women really didn’t want to be placed in a certain group based on the thoughts of society then they would actually do something about it! I think the fact that we blame a lot of our problems on society just shows how insecure we really are with ourselves.
To solve this problem that we are facing I think we should run more things like the Dove campaign. It shows not only that we really put our own selves down, but that others don’t really find as many faults in us as we do in ourselves. It’s definitely a reality check and I think it could help a lot of women see how it’s themselves that is the real problem.
I think that a lot of girls in this town are really concerned with their appearance when they shouldn’t be. They should just be concerned about what makes them happy and not others. As far as women in town not being represented enough, I think that it is because they have their own problems that they can’t set aside.
Women, love yourself for who you are and forget about what others think of you.
●Caroline Cunningham●
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteGirls strive for perfection more often than boys do. This is evident in the fact that girls are outperforming boys in school. While striving for perfection isn’t necessarily a bad thing, the reasons for it can be bad. It seems that girls try to compete with others girls often, in just about every category of life. Whether it is appearance, grades, athletics or whatever, girls want to be the best and better than their peers. Another issue with striving for perfection is, of course, that perfection is impossible. One mistake that someone makes could be blown out of proportion by themselves and maybe others, and girls seem to worry about the little mistakes more than guys do. If others were not as judgmental, then maybe girls wouldn’t worry about small mistakes and imperfections as much. Sadly, this will never change and is another example of society having a negative effect on girls. In short, girls feel pressured by other girls and society to be as perfect as possible. Many of these problems can be found in boys as well, but they seem to be much more prevalent in girls.
ReplyDeleteEthan Aldridge
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI'm not exactly sure where to begin with this post so bear with me if it sounds like I'm rambling. I can't really say there's anything wrong with girls themselves or boys (hence, why when given an option last time, I chose to let that one slide). It's all about public and self perception. Girls worry too much about what's on the outside that they suit their inner perceptions to what other perceive about them. I personally think the inside matters much more than the outside. Of course, what do I know? I'm a boy and have never been and don't plan to be a girl so I really do know what it's like in their shoes.
ReplyDeleteThere. I gave the best shot I could at answering a vague question about something I have no experience with.
-Evan Hatter
Boys will be boys. Girls will be girls.
ReplyDeleteMaybe these statements are wrong. Maybe these statements are the reasons that girls are the way they are. They are expected to be like all of the other ‘successful’, ‘beautiful’ women that are picked by some important figure or moral that we have chosen to believe in, but why? Because they have been given the title ‘beautiful’ or successful’ and that is what we are supposed to strive to be.
Everyone is naturally beautiful, and you shouldn’t have to change yourself in order to show people this. We want to be accepted, well liked, even admired, so we change to fit others preferences, but in reality, most people prefer to be around someone who is themselves, someone who has a personality and doesn’t try to be someone who they’re not.
As for success, this depends on the individual. If you achieve your goals and are happy with yourself, then that, to me, is true success. If becoming a model or becoming the first female President are your goals, then good for you, but futures with these accomplishments in them do not define success. You do what you want to do, not what society wants or expects you to do.
Girls decide their own fate. So do boys. Society and other people affect us way too much, and they always will. We have to look past expectations and judgments and just be ourselves.
Society will be society. People will be people. Girls (and boys) should be whatever they’d like to be.
Darby Taylor
I’d like to start off this reply by saying that in no way am I trying to be hurtful to anybody.
ReplyDeleteI believe/hope that when Shawn said “women care too much”, he was trying to say that women shouldn’t listen to the pressures of society so much because that is what is adding all the stress to their lives. Women I believe would be better off if they realized that there is no such thing as perfect and that every single person has a few rough spots but they have so many beautiful and amazing and wonderful qualities. (I know I’m not in this position but this is what I would try to do if I was.)
Now for the general overall question: “What’s wrong with girls?”. I believe that the answer is nothing at all. Honestly I think the better and more philosophical question for this blog would’ve been “What’s wrong with society?”, because the general public is the root of a large amount of our psychological problems. Even though this doesn’t relate directly back to the question I’ll share the effects that the pressures of society have had on me. Even though all of these have been general pressures, I have been called all of these things directly: fat, ugly, and worthless. The fact that I was labeled as worthless made me feel absolutely horrible. That night and many times since then and even before then I have/had gone through all the scenarios of how my life could play out and how it’s going right and admitted to myself that I was worthless. Luckily I have proven myself since then and now my worth and where I belong. The comment and pressure that has affected me the most, was the one about my weight. There was a point late last school year where I was so self-conscious about my weight that I started to starve myself. I ate dinner like I usually would so my parents wouldn’t notice but I would have one mini-muffin for breakfast and I would skip eating lunch at school. This process went on for about a month, when my parents checked my lunch records they found out that I hadn’t had lunch for an extended period of time.
I hope by reading this blog post you understand that there isn’t a single thing wrong with girls. Society’s general idea of perfect is what’s at fault and everyone feels the pressures imposed by society.
Todd Stetler
Too often we are presented with the overly generalized issue of girls sense of isolation, fear, and lack of confidence which leads to eating disorders, self-harming behavior and suicide. After reading previous posts, I am in complete disagreeance with many. It is said repeatedly that "society" is to blame for the negative issues which control the lives of girls. By blaming society, this perception of girls is only growing as we continue to assume every girl is consumed by these issues. Society is made up of more than the magazines we see, or the tweets we read. Society includes our government, attractions, technology, sports, education, and numerous other areas we seem to exclude when dealing with girls. I am of the opinion that a girl's lack of self esteem is a direct reflection of her hobbies and interests. A different way to look at the controversy, right? Girls absorbed with image when applied to glamour and fashion tend to struggle with the unhealthy life choices we're so concerned with. Where as, girls who spend their time absorbed in other areas such as sports and politics tend to focus on these less. Aside from girls, the interest areas of boys can also be used when dealing with what is wrong with boys. Although it does not make the headlines, there are boys who deal with the same unhealthy life choices as girls when spending their time absorbed with image, proving that this is not a gender specific issue.
ReplyDeleteGrace Higgs
Although I am a girl, I can't provide a concise answer to this question. Girls (and boys) are a very broad topic- we're talking about roughly half of the population of the world with either gender. Every individual has their own problems and struggles, which may or may not have anything to do their gender. We can't categorize everyone's problems based on gender. However, I will attempt to try to offer a possible explanation for an impossible question.
ReplyDeleteI think girls in general struggle with what they want to be or who they want to be perceived as. While society's expectations of boys have remained fairly constant throughout time, the expectations of girls are ever changing. Within the last century, we've shifted from the traditional view of women as being the stay at home moms who cook, clean, and take care of the children to a new, modern, independent woman who, theoretically, can be anything she wants to be. The question is, who is she?
I've observed throughout my young life how often girls can completely change their persona. We're influenced by the contrasting views of many outside factors- for instance, there's the perfect daughter your parents want you to be, there's the ideal companion your friends expect you to be, and, of course, there are the many mixed messages society and the media send of who they think you should strive to be. Don't be dumb, but also don't be a know it all. Don't be a slut, but also don't be a prude. Don't be a "freak", but also don't be a "prep". Don't try too hard, but also don't not try at all. We fear the judgement that comes with not pleasing everyone. In all of this, girls forget who they want to be, or rather, they don't even know who they want to be.
In this constant struggle to live up to everyone's expectations of them, girls are overwhelmed by the pressure they face. That nagging feeling that we're not good enough weighs in on our minds and the need to reach unattainable standards consumes us. This is what leads to insecurity, low self esteem, and increased rates of depression, self harm, and suicide. When we can't please everyone, when we can't live up to society's standards, when we can't achieve absolute perfection, we feel like a failure. Not only that, but when we encounter someone who seems to have outperformed us in some way, our first instinct is too put them down and criticize them. We're driven by hatred and jealously. In trying to better ourselves and be nothing less than the best, we become our own cynical downfall.
It's a sad cycle to continuously watch and endure, but any change would have to start with how we choose to see ourselves.
Diana Rudic
I see a lot of posts talking about the general female and some keep overlapping with each other, talking about how girls have low self-esteem or our emotions or how we feel the need to impress someone. I'm not saying that's wrong; in fact, for most of us that is right on point. That's all we think about. I'm guilty myself for not wanting to go to school because I feel like I could look better if I took a second shower that morning and redid all my makeup and hair, or even because I didn't want to see someone.
ReplyDeleteHowever, most people are talking about the first world struggles that society is making women feel. They want women to seem perfect, well mannered, and willing to do anything that someone asks of them. Who cares if a woman wants to be individualistic and her own person with her own thoughts?
A big issue I see no one discussing is the fact that there are people who were not born biologically female, but do identify as one. While many cisgendered females are struggling with getting good grades, or trying to get a certain someone to finally notice us, trans women, or people who identify as women in general are just trying to live their lives without getting beat up by people who don't accept them or ridiculed everywhere they turn (It's not only trans women, of course, but this is a post about girls, so I’m mentioning them).
Up until recently, transgendered people could get fired from their job if anyone found out if they were transgendered until The Employment Nondiscrimination Act was passed to prevent that. Trans women face harsher judgment on what they wear, how they act, and how they hold themselves even more so than cisgendered women just because they do not identify as the gender they were born with.
This is all slowly changing, of course, but the issue is still there.
Aurora Strider
In today’s society, all we see are rail thin models with perfectly photo-shopped skin and features. We see it in commercials and billboards and magazines. No wonder girls are so self-conscious, we are stuck comparing ourselves with people who have been perfected. Even in the past women have been compared by looks. It may be who had the more expensive clothes, or the prettiest features, or the best body type. But the real question is what we all should be considering beautiful. This has changed throughout history. Some of the features considered beautiful centuries ago, may not be considered beautiful today. What makes us beautiful? It is not always our outward appearance.
ReplyDeleteYour view of your own beauty is not the only factor that affects self-esteem. Self-esteem is how highly you value yourself. If you feel like you are disappointing and failing people, you will probably have a lower self-esteem. Another factor is the environment you grow up in and how your parents treated you as a child. In the “Dove Campaign for ‘normal’ women,” a woman describes herself by what her mother told her she looked like. She replied when asked about her jaw, “My mom told me I had a big jaw.” This one comment from her mother helped to shape this woman’s image of herself and maybe brought down her confidence.
When I was younger, I was always being compared to my older sibling. With my older sister who learned to play the Barney theme song by ear on the piano at the age of 2 and getting a score of 32 on her first try on the ACT, its stressful being compared to her. Everybody always thinks that they have to live up to you older siblings standards. They talk about wanting to beat there older siblings ACT scores. I could say I am one of those people but I am not. I want to do good and all, but compared to Lacy I will always be at least second, if not third, when considering Madison, place in some things. I know that I am good at some things and that is what we should focus on. We should focus on our strengths, not our weaknesses. I am not saying that we should all just stop caring about our weaknesses and avoid them. No, I think we should try to become better in all aspects of our life, but don’t let that one thing you aren't as good at, bring down your self-esteem and confidence. I try not to let it bring down mine.
Rachel Wallace
Incorrect form of there in line 20. It's supposed to be their.
DeleteAdmiral General Jacob "Aladeen" Silvernail
Whats wrong with girls? I think its the society we live in and in my opinion it will never go away. There will always be a standard of some kind that females will be expected to follow. In ancient Greece women were considered 'beautiful' if they had a few extra pounds on them with some nice curves. And if you didn't have those extra pounds you would most likely be considered unhealthy, poor, and unattractive. Now is the time wear you have to have a 22in waist. So whats wrong with girls? The pressure that society puts on them to be 'the perfect look.' But its not just about looks. Back in the renaissance it was thought that girls were delicate and subservient to men. So even though we have the girl power and all that going on it is still generalized that women need to be meeker and in the shadow of boys. With all this going on in a girls head what's she going think? Is she going to want to be the one to stand up in this judgmental world? No many don't have the courage to show their true potential for fear of how others will think of them.
ReplyDelete-The Muses of Sharon Hockensmith-
Girls in general have more emotion than boys, so in result we feel more when it comes to social and self issues. I don't feel like there is something necessarily wrong with girls we just deal with our feelings and emotions differently but the appearance may seem like there is something wrong with us. With such strong emotions we are bound to act to extremely to things such as body issues, not being as good as the other etc. We only compare ourselves to each other so much is because we wish to have the same emotion as the other person. We want to a certain body type of that said other person so we can then think that we are as "perfect" as the other person. Again wanting to feel "perfect" is an emotion because logically no one can be perfect. Since we are always told no one is perfect we go ahead and make up an impression of what is "perfect" in our minds-to compare ourselves too so that we can try to achieve that feeling "perfect" emotion. In short this is just an example of how our strong emotions effect what we do to prove to ourselves that we are "perfect" or aren't. Either way the appearance of this emotion to other people is wrong and bad so that results in people thinking that since we think that way automatically there is something wrong with girls.
ReplyDeleteBailey Bishop
The majority of the post on this blog have all been about how girls are seeing themselves as something they aren’t, girls are trying too hard to fit in, girls care to much about what they look like, girls take critics too seriously, the list goes on and on. I agree that there are a lot of problems facing women in society, as there are a lot of problems facing males, minorities, and all other groups of people. It’s almost funny how girls on this blog have been so busy saying all the bad things going on with themselves and with women as a whole that they have ignored all the great things women have achieved in the past few decades.
ReplyDelete• Women in the US outpace men in college degrees, with36 percent of those ages 25-29 attaining a bachelor’s compared with 28 percent for men.
• Women are in line to run for office in equal numbers with men in the Oct. 23 elections.
• After defeating a potential gender-discrimination lawsuit, Walmart launched a new program to buy $20 billion worth of products from female-owned businesses and to donate $100 million to women’s nonprofit groups.
• Beth Mooney was appointed CEO of KeyCorp bank, making her the first female chief of a top-20 U.S. bank.
• The United States now ranks as the 8th best place to be a woman.
These are only a select few things in a huge list but still show how vastly in equality between men and women has changed in only a few decades. It is still not equal by all means, but I think someone needed to take a moment and show that women have a lot going for them right now, and honestly there isn’t as much “wrong with girls” as being made out to be. In places like Chad and Afghanistan, who rank 1 and 2 on the worst places for women to live, women still do not have nearly the rights women in the U.S. have today, and to me that is something worth working on and improving, as well as still fighting for the women’s rights here in America.
Good work ladies;
-Keenan Jones-
Information from Newsweek "Where women are winning".
Okay girls, i realize this is going to be incredibly sexist. I also realize you may or may not be offended by my post, this is not personal nor directed towards any one person individually. It is merely an observation based on what i have read and seen.
ReplyDeleteWhats wrong with girl? From what i have noticed girls preform better in school, they seem to be more sensitive in situations and easily fall into situations they themselves do not necessarily want to be in, i am a listener and being such alot of people tell me alot of stuff everybody has problems but girls tend to worry more about thier problems and take any advice and not do anything. This is what is wrong with girls
-lyle turner
I know that meager words cannot ever fully answer the question of what is wrong with girls, society evolves year after year changing the ways girls perceive themselves; for the worse. If society, the media to be exact; portrayed women as a healthy size 8 with an average height, and build. Women would then feel more comfortable in their own skin, and never feel like they have to measure up and be compared to deathly skinny, leggy blondes. No offense to the girls that are naturally that way, but for the majority of society it just isn't right.
ReplyDeleteThis self image society has created for girls, has been the downfall of all feminine confidence, we aren't pretty enough or skinny enough in our own minds, and therefore cannot even be comfortable in our own skins and lives. We lose self-confidence or never have it to begin with when we feel like people are judging us, or we will never measure up.
I don't think that there will ever be a solution to this problem, seeing as the media will ever change, but as always there can be hope that society will perceive women as they truly are beautiful.
Mackenzie Jones
Girls are a complex bunch. I’ve come to the conclusion that most girls are trapped in a perpetual cycle of trying to achieve perfection, being disappointed and trying even harder or maybe never realizing that perfection is unattainable. The media has painted women to be these majestic creatures, practically flawless, oozing perfection… from the outside. The problem with this is that it’s completely fabricated to simply persuade the population on whatever is being sold or whatever ideas are being promoted. The problem will continue to get worse.
ReplyDeleteThe younger generation is under even more pressure now, what with all the technology they have access to. When girls realize that what they’re striving for is impossible to achieve, in some cases they blame it on themselves, thinking that they are the problem. In academic areas, women most likely push themselves for the same reason they might make sure they keep buying all the latest and greatest clothing and technology- they don’t want to feel outdone or left out by people around them. This isn’t always the case, just like some girls may not feel as much pressure to change who they are. Until girls quit thinking that any particular flaw will ruin their whole self, and until we stop letting the media fool us, nothing will change.
-Emilee Agee
We girls feel that we have to meet not just one persons expectations but everyone’s. keeping good grades, looking pretty, staying “in shape”. I think that girls care to much about what other people think and they think to much about trying to meet everyone’s expectations instead of just worrying about themselves. I think that the reason girls don’t worry about themselves is because they simply care to much about what other people think of them or getting someone’s attention. also because girls are over emotional if they get shot down by one guy there going to think there is something wrong with them and then going to start doing anything too look better and try and get them back . I think that everything that is wrong with girls is simply just mental; everything that they have in their mind about hot girls is everything that they think that they have to be when in reality they don’t have to be any of it.
ReplyDeleteI also agree with Sidney when she says that girls are surrounded with stereotypes such as the hot pink and flowers on the girls on the run website. I know that I hate the color pink and I don’t want anything to do with flowers. And all of that is just showing girls as they are all the same they all like the color pink and they all think that every girl is just the same with the same girly interests when that’s not true and there are probably a lot of girls that are scared to things because they are stereotyped for a boy. But I don’t think that it is stereotypes that are wrong with us I think that being afraid to do something at all is what’s wrong with not only girls but everyone.
I don’t think I know that boys are complete opposite and they probably don’t even think about anything, they are usually the ones that go with the flow they are usually the ones that don’t care about things such as a breakup. They don’t think they have expectations to meet unless they are their own expectations. And I think it’s funny to look at the difference between the guys posts on this than on the “what’s wrong with boys” they are almost scared to say something because the fear of the reaction of what a girl might say back whereas on the boys blog they would probably argue all day on how there is nothing wrong with boys.
-Annie Cunningham
I also think that us girls try too hard to meet others expantations.
Delete-quanesha clay
Girls, girls, girls. What is wrong with us? Why do we feel the need to tear others down? Why judge each other verses just accept people for who they are?
ReplyDeleteGirls are emotional wrecks, whether we show it or not. Some are able to hide their emotions better than others. I believe, and I may be completely wrong, that girls tear others down to make themselves feel better. I feel that as a girl, we always have to look good and be better than the other girls. Everything is a competition.
Why do we judge people? Why does anyone judge someone? I'm not sure why we judge people, but I feel if girls girls are the worst with it. I'm awkward, I know this and I'm sure I get judged a lot for my actions. The other question is why should we care about what others think of us. Part of the reason why we put ourselves down is because we are put down. Girls need to care less about what others think.
Shannon McCutcheon
To be honest I don't think there is anything wrong with girls or boys. I think it is just the way that society puts spins on new illnesses or just putting a label on what beautiful or normal looks like.
ReplyDeleteMost girla are fine with their looks or schoool or their outside lives but a some are insecure on their position in society and what they think should be a normal girl. Don't blame her, blame the label that we put on beautiful, or skinny, or clear. I think "issues" would clear up if we didn't label people for what they look like but for who the are and act like.
-Madison-a little late on this post-Whitman
In my opinion girls have a problem with listening too much about what society has to say about them. Media has a strong influence on the way people think and feel; this especially applies to girls. Media puts this blindfold on girls and tells them the way it wants to see them; they take these ideas to heart and try their hardest to achieve this status. In my opinion it is quite pathetic the way society wants girls to think. Society says you need to have this look in order to fit in with everyone, which takes originality away from people’s personalities. This originality is what is supposed to drive someone to achieve their goals and dreams. Instead this media we have today wants many to think their dreams are not possible without this status of being superior to others by having the latest and greatest fashion.
ReplyDeleteThis media is a lie, and should be looked down on by girls but instead it grabs onto them and won’t let go. Girls are becoming a very hard working society that will do a lot for the world, but when there is this false image of how they should be, dreams will crumble and depression will set in. The biggest problem I see in girls is this depression that follows most of them due to society’s teachings. Society sees failure as this terrible thing that people do that they should be ashamed of. When society demonstrates this girls are scared about this failure and will try too hard to stay away from it. I say accept this failure and move on do not dwell on what happened yesterday think ahead and strive to be yourself not this thing society says you have to be.
-Dylan Ruble-
I agree with you all the way the media does have a big influence on women and what the ideal women is.Its all bs god made all people different so we should stop trying to look like the people t.v
Delete-quanesha clay
Girl's tend to worry about most everything and the media doesn't alway's help out. The media has a great impact on many, many, many girl's all over the world- your hair has to be like this, you can only wear brand name clothing, alway's act like this, or sit like that, or breathe like this. It's absurd. Personally, as a girl, I used to stress so much about what other's thought of me until the point I broke, so back on my feet again I stopped caring as much- that doesn't mean I never cared again, till this day I still freak over what someone's going to say if I do this, or I like that. But it does mean that I have got alot more joyful and comfortable with who I am. Now I realize at school my face is always straight unless I find something funny but I am a very happy girl and proud of myself. A big problem is girl's pay to much attention to people who just bring them down for the joy of it. They let people tear them down from the inside out until they're so empty they don't want to do anything. If the media didn't try to drown us in their idea of perfection then perfection wouldn't be such a neccesity for most girl's, it belittle's girl's and I, personally, think it is a big reason that suicide, and self-harm rates rasie nearly every year and never decrease. I think girl's out perform boy's acdimically is because girl's are so much more competitve with other girl's, to out do them. Whereas boy's don't care as much, they do what they do and then they're done, not much competiton and trying to out do one another.
ReplyDelete-Kendra Harris
whats wrong with us girls? i think that boys are whats wrong with us. so i think the question should be whats wrong with boys? their annoying immature and rude haha . i dont mean to sound like a guy hater or anything but they make us crazy. i cant lie there are some girls out there that are crazy for no reason at all and have mood swings. i think its because we have more pressure too look good and we have more too deal with.
ReplyDelete-quanesha clay